Notes from the UP Road

Farewell

2008-07-28T13:35:00.002-04:00

This blog has come to the end of its useful life. It seemed silly to keep writing Notes from the UP Road, when I'm no longer traveling UP Roads. At least not for long. I've created a new blog - if you've been a faithful reader of this one - I thank you.

Check out the new blog - it'll have moving stories (stories about the move, rather than ones that will make you cry, I suspect), house stories, ministry stories, reflections on life and love, really anything that seems worth writing about.

I hope to be more disciplined about writing there. Do check it out at:

www.whitemountainmusings.blogspot.com

Peace,

Fran

Reflections on Ministry, Part 4

2008-07-23T00:20:00.002-04:00

This is the fourth and final reflection in my series reflection on my time as the Missioner Intern in the Epsicopal Diocese of Northern Michigan. I was having some trouble getting Safari to interface with Blogger, so this one took a while to get up. Remember that it was initially written to the people in Western Region. They are the you I am addressing.

There is one factor that is simply essential to being an effective missioner/ministry developer. Understanding its centrality to the work is the most important lesson I learned in my two years in the Western Region.

Relationships are at the center of the work that we do. In order for a missioner to work effectively with a congregation, there must be a relationship. All the people involved need to build trust. They need to care about one another. They need to know that the relationship is strong enough to withstand disagreement. If the relationship is healthy, anything can happen. Hard truths can be told. Risks can be taken. God’s work can be accomplished.

As I’ve conversed with the congregations that might employ me next, this is the single most important thing I’ve told them: First, we need to get to know one another and build our relationship. Then, we can figure out what the work is that we need to do together.

I want you to know that the relationships that have been built during my time with you are the most important gift I received in the two years that I have been among you. You reached out, shared of yourselves and your stories (and learned about me and my stories), and built the kinds of relationships out of which grow good effective ministry. You didn’t have to do it. We all knew this was likely to be a short-term gig. And yet, you did it anyway.

As I leave this place, my heart and mind are full. Full of love. Full of gratitude. Full of many many memories of the people and congregations I’ve encountered in this place. On the day that I officially transferred into this diocese, Jim Kelsy sent me an email with a subject line that read, “Now you’re a Yooper!” Except, I wasn’t really one, then. However, as much as any girl born and raised out east can be, I am one now. By living among you and being loved by you (and, as I hope you know, loving you in return) I’ve become a Yooper by adoption – and I will carry you with me when I go out from this place.

So, my friends, thank you. Thank you for many wonderful meals, spare beds to sleep in, and great conversations. Thank you for sharing your laughter and your tears. Thank you for encouraging me and challenging me. Thank you for welcoming me into your midst. And finally, thank you for sending me out into the world a far better Missioner/Ministry Developer than I was when I arrived two years ago.

Reflections on Ministry, Part 3

2008-06-18T17:13:00.004-04:00

This post is the third in a series of four, reflecting on my two years working as the Ministry Development Intern in the Western Region of the Diocese of Northern Michigan. This week, I decided that it was time to stop being so serious.

For the past two weeks, I've written about the skills I've been developing and about the things I've learned about myself. This week, I thought I would share the conventional wisdom that discovered over the past two years. So, here it is....Fran's Top Ten List of Conventional Missioner/Ministry Developer Wisdom. (Note that some of this is largely personal and some of this is probably good advice for everybody!)

10. Get a good map. The best way to learn my way around a new area is to get a good map and then use it. Repeatedly. I'm still learning shortcuts after 75,000 miles.

9. Get lost on purpose. Sometimes it's a good idea to take the time to drive down a road, just to see where it goes.

8. Audible.com rocks. Driving well between two and three thousand miles per month could be wasted time. The $15 per month cost of an audible.com subscription would be worth it at twice the price. I encountered a number of books that strongly influenced me in the past year, and they were all books that I listened to on my iPod. ("What were they?" you ask. Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert, The Omnivore's Dilemma by Michael Pollan, A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini, and Three Cups of Tea by Greg Mortinsen and David Oliver Relin).

7. XM Radio rocks, too. Any device that gives this displaced Boston Red Sox fan access to live Red Sox baseball is worth its weight in gold.

6. ALWAYS carry snacks in the car; make sure that some of those snacks contain protein. Any number of things can happen to change the course of a day, and I am absolutely useless if I am hungry.

5. Remember to eat the snacks. I must eat one of the aforementioned snacks before church every Sunday morning, even if I think I'm not hungry. I recently learned the hard way that it is very difficult to preside and preach when my blood sugar is plummeting rapidly.

4. Make time to read. It took me a while to settle in to a routine. But not reading, for professional development and for fun, is simply not an option.

3. Be early. By now, you might know me well enough to know that being on time is a challenge. (I think that I managed to fool most of you for quite a while, but the above statement is, sadly, true.) However, it's so much better to arrive early - whether it's for a meeting, a service, or lunch. I do whatever I'm doing better when I am not feeling rushed.

2. Just do it. I can be a bit of a procrastinator. (This may qualify as the understatement of the year!) It took me some time to get adjusted to working from home. I also struggle with ambiguous deadlines. The sooner I get a project done, the less I have to worry about it.

1. Snow tires really are better than all season radials in this part of the world. Need I say more?

Reflections on Ministry, Part 2

2008-06-13T13:03:00.004-04:00

These reflections are part of my proces of concluding my time as the Ministry Developer Intern. They were originally written for the Western Region's E-Newsletter. The "you" addressed in the reflections are the people of the Western Region, with whom I have lived and worked during the last two years.

Last week, I wrote about some of the particular skills I've worked on, in order to be an effective Missioner/Ministry Developer. This week, I am reflecting on some of the transformation that has taken place within me, as I have lived and worked among you.

I try to hide it, but on the inside I am not always confident. When I first arrived, I felt very shy and unsure of myself. This was a whole new arena for me, and I was afraid that I was not up to the task. Manuel [my supervisor] was terrific. I've told him privately, but let me just say publicly and for the record, that he is the best supervisor I've ever had. He encouraged me to reach beyond what felt comfortable (and frankly, at the beginning, that was just about everything!) and to take risks. When I made mistakes, he didn't give me grief. Instead, he asked me what I'd learned, and how I might do something differently the next time. Learning to ask this question, rather than beat myself up for making a mistake, has changed me.

Manuel's quiet encouragement fostered my own self-confidence. While there are certainly still many moments when I wonder what the right course of action is (and I'll always have those moments!), I've learned to trust my own intuition. If my gut tells me something, I listen and act.

The book of Ecclesiates tells us that there is a season for everything. A time to plant, and a time to reap, a time to mourn and a time to dance, etc. For a missioner, there is a time to be quiet and a time to speak. I've worked hard to learn (and am still learning) what that balance is for myself. Some of this learning about balance comes from my own increased comfort with conflict. In the past, I spent an enormous amount of energy trying to keep everyone I worked with happy. That's neither possible, nor helpful. I've gotten much more comfortable with ambiguity, with uncertainty, and with leaving things unresolved for a time.

All of these personal learnings have helped me to become better at what I do. They enable me to act, without worrying (too much) about whether the action is the right thing.

Reflections on Ministry, Part 1

2008-06-06T11:03:00.003-04:00

It's hard to believe that my time in Northern Michigan, serving as the Ministry Developer Intern, is coming to a close. (It might seem more real if I knew where I was going next, but that's a story for another day!) I was asked to write some reflections on my experience, to share with the region and the diocese. I thought I would also post them here. I'll post one per week, as they appear in the Western Region's electronic newsletter. Since I was originally writing them for the people in the region, they are the YOU to whom the reflections are addressed.

These reflections were written so that I might share some of what I have learned during my two years as the Missioner/Ministry Developer Intern in the Western Region of the Episcopal Diocese of Northern Michigan. I’ve learned so many things, that listing them out seems like a daunting task. In the end, I decided to divide up what I’ve learned into four different areas, reflecting a bit on one area each week.

It seems a bit obvious to say it, but one of the most important things I’ve learned is how to be a missioner! Seminary training is generally geared towards those who want to be rectors, so I spent much of my early time in the position trying to reorient myself to a new way of being. I had done some reading about mutual ministry, but that was, of course, no substitute for actually practicing mutual ministry in real congregations with real people. You were very patient!

Teaching is an important part of the job – teaching in sermons, teaching in Ministry Support Team meetings, teaching any time the opportunity comes up. I’ve discovered that many things can be teaching moments. Sharing the benefits of my seminary training with all of you is an important responsibility of the work. You can undertake your ministries most effectively when you have the knowledge that you need.

The people that I work with (that’s all of you!) have a great number of skills and talents (that’s not a surprise – I learned that VERY quickly). However, you don’t always see them. Therefore, another piece of what I have learned is that being a missioner involves being a cheerleader and an encourager.

My position as one who is both inside and outside the congregation gives me some perspective that those of you in the congregation may not have. This perspective allows me to do two things. First, I can help when conflict arises within congregations. And, it enables me to watch the horizon. It’s important that I look ahead, in order to see what’s coming up, and to make sure that you are ready for whatever it is before it gets here.

Another important lesson is that no two congregations are alike. Often, friends will ask me what my job involves. My answer is always that there is no one way to be a missioner. The job requires getting to know each congregation, and then adapting one’s work to fit the needs of that particular group.

I’m still not sure what I’ll be doing next, but I do know, as I’ve begun interviewing for other positions, that the things I’ve learned about being a missioner will serve me well. As I’ve answered questions from congregations about the work I might do with them, I’ve drawn on the things I’ve learned about being an effective missioner. I may go on from here to work with a single congregation as rector, but it’s clear to me that I will be a rector who is first and foremost a ministry developer.

Fran's Ordination - the sermon, 2/2

2008-04-19T18:42:00.001-04:00

Yup. Here it is. Part two of the ordination sermon.

Fran's ordination sermon 1/2

2008-04-19T18:20:00.001-04:00

This is the first half of the sermon that my friend Anne Kirchmier preached at my ordination to the diaconate over two years ago. The setting is Virginia Theological Seminary and the owner of the video camera is Sarah Gordy. The video quality is pretty sketchy, but the audio quality is excellent. And, I must say this is one of the best sermons I've ever had the privilege to hear. Part 2 will appear eventually.

Top 100 Books

2008-03-10T10:49:00.002-04:00

I've stolen this list from my friend Suzanne's blog. It's a list of the Top 100 books of all time, as voted by regular folks. I've highlighted it in two ways - the books I read before I graduated from college, versus the books I've read since then.

The pre-college graduation books are highlighted in blue. The post-college ones, in red.

1. 1984 by George Orwell
2. The Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien
3. The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
4. Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen
5. To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee (I finally read this last year, and thought it was amazing. Thanks to Sister Nancy Hopkins for the push.)
6. Crime and Punishment by Fyodor Dostoevsky
7. The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald
8. Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov
9. Catch-22 by Joseph Heller
10. Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte
11. Brave New World by Aldous Huxley
12. Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte
13. Ulysses by James Joyce
14. Animal Farm by George Orwell
15. Great Expectations by Charles Dickens
16. The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams
17. The Brothers Karamazov by Fyodor Dostoevsky
18. Les Miserables by Victor Hugo
19. The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde
20. The Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck
21. The Hobbit by J.R.R. Tolkien
22. Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy
23. Don Quixote by Miguel de Cervantes
24. The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas
25. A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens
26. Frankenstein by Mary Shelley
27. East of Eden by John Steinbeck
28. A Clockwork Orange by Anthony Burgess
29. Life of Pi by Yann Martel
30. Lord of the Flies by William Golding
31. Gone with the Wind by Margaret Mitchell
32. One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez
33. War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy
34. The Sound and the Fury by William Faulkner
35. The Da Vinci Code by Dan Brown
36. Ender’s Game by Orson Scott Card
37. Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier
38. Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury
39. Memoirs of a Geisha by Arthur Golden
40. Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut
41. The Time Traveler’s Wife by Audrey Niffenegger
42. A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man by James Joyce
43. The Master and Margarita by Mikhail Bulgakov
44. His Dark Materials by Phillip Pullman
45. The Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis
46. Invisible Man by Ralph Ellison
47. Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand
48. The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini
49. The Stand by Stephen King
50. A Farewell to Arms by Ernest Hemingway
51. Heart of Darkness by Joseph Conrad
52. Tess of the D’Urbervilles by Thomas Hardy
53. The Sun Also Rises by Ernest Hemingway
54. The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand
55. Watership Down by Richard Adams
56. Dracula by Bram Stoker
57. Of Human Bondage by W. Somerset Maugham
58. Moby Dick by Herman Melville
59. One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest by Ken Kesey
60. The Heart is a Lonely Hunter by Carson McCullers
61. On the Road by Jack Kerouac
62. The Idiot by Fyodor Dostoevsky
63. Pale Fire by Vladimir Nabokov
64. Dune by Frank Herbert
65. The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver (This is, officially, my favorite book of all time. I'm thrilled that it made the list.)
66. Harry Potter Series by J.K. Rowling
67. Anne of Green Gables by L.M. Montgomery
68. Doctor Zhivago by Boris Pasternak
69. The Unbearable Lightness of Being by Milan Kundera
70. Gravity’s Rainbow by Thomas Pynchon
71. Little Women by Louisa May Alcott
72. The Trial by Franz Kafka
73. I, Claudius by Robert Graves
74. The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time by Mark Haddon
75. Madame Bovary by Gustave Flaubert
76. The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath
77. A Confederacy of Dunces by John Kennedy Toole
78. The Old Man and the Sea by Ernest Hemingway
79. To the Lighthouse by Virginia Woolf
80. Vanity Fair by William Thackeray
81. Love in the Time of Cholera by Gabriel Garcia Marquez
82. The Stranger by Albert Camus
83. The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain
84. The Hunchback of Notre Dame by Victor Hugo
85. The Phantom of the Opera by Gaston LeRoux
86. For Whom the Bell Tolls by Ernest Hemingway
87. Jude the Obscure by Thomas Hardy
88. Oliver Twist by Charles Dickens
89. The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
90. Persuasion by Jane Austen
91. Light in August by William Faulkner
92. Franny and Zooey by J.D. Salinger
93. Call of the Wild by Jack London
94. Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides
95. Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll
96. Uncle Tom’s Cabin by Harriet Beecher Stowe
97. The Metamorphosis by Franz Kafka
98. The Name of the Rose by Umberto Eco
99. The Clan of the Cave Bear by Jean M. Auel
100. As I Lay Dying by William Faulkner

So, I've read 35 of them. About 1/3 of the list. And of that 35, only 12 of them, in the last 20 years. Suzanne rather jokingly suggested an online Top 100 book group. We could all read one each month, and then check in with one another about what we think. I'm half-convinced that it's a great idea. Anybody out there game for the idea?

Michigan's Messed-up Primary or Small Town Joys

2008-01-14T23:25:00.000-05:00

Perhaps you've heard about the messed-up presidential primary in Michigan. The State Party Muckety-Mucks, tired of having our ballots cast after all the decisions had already been made, stated that they would move our presidential primary to January 15th. The National Party Muckety-Mucks, said, "Oh, no," and threatened to penalize the state, should the primary move.

The primary moved; we've been penalized. Oh look, cause and effect. The only candidates who've been campaigning here are Romney, McCain, and Huckabee. Let's just say that it made for some exciting TV watching this weekend. NOT.

It's not yet clear whether any of Michigan's Democratic delegates will be seated at the convention this summer, which is why the candidates aren't bothering to campaign here. It's also why most Democratic candidates aren't even on the ballot. And, apparently writing in my choice disqualifies my vote. So, my limited presidential primary voting options are as follows. (1) Vote for Hillary Rodham Clinton. She's on the ballot, but she's so not my choice for President. (2) Vote for Dennis Kucinich. He's on the ballot, but he's also not my choice (though he's a far sight closer than HRC). (3) Vote for Uncommitted Delegate. There's absolutely no guarantee that the delegate will support the candidate of my choice, but at least I'm not voting for the candidate NOT of my choice, right? (4) Say screw it and not vote at all.

To make matters more complicated, I left Ontonagon this afternoon. Now, what you may not know about me is that I am a committed voter. I don't skip elections. I believe deeply that voting is a privilege. But neither could I couldn't quite justify making an extra 232 mile round trip in order to vote in this debacle. Especially not to vote for Mr. or Ms. Uncommitted Delegate. So, this morning, I called the Town Clerk and begged to vote by absentee ballot, which he allowed me to do, about 20 minutes before he closed the office. I LOVE living in a small town.

I'm feeling pissed off about the whole situation. I've been an Obama supporter for over a year now, and I feel ripped off that I didn't get to vote for him. On the other hand, I did get to exercise my civic duty. And, I suppose that's really what this is all about. And, I got to appreciate, yet again, the joys of living in a small town.

A New Year's Meme

2008-01-10T00:28:00.001-05:00

1. What did you do in 2007 that you have never done before?

Go on a cruise. In general, I didn't really expect to like it, and I wasn't wrong about that expectation. But, I traveled with four women I love (Mom, Anne Kirchmier, Linda Ricketts, and Liz Tunney) and that was terrific and worth all the things about the cruise I didn't care so much about (too many people, too much trying to sell me stuff I didn't want to buy).

2. Did you keep your new year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I'm not much for New Year's Resolutions, but I did want to try to live healthier in 2007. I think I did fairly well in some regards. Food allergies caused me to give up pop (soda to those of you living elsewhere!) and I've been getting more exercise. I've vowed to continue this in 2008, as well as to get more in touch with my body. I've signed up for a Yoga class.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

No, though good friends did take in some foster children.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

Sadly, yes. I'm still deeply mourning my friend and bishop Jim Kelsey. Additionally, Fran Robertson and Larry Livingston in Little Lake.

5. What countries did you visit?

I made several passes through Canada in 2007, and on the cruise, visited Jamaica, the Cayman Islands, Mexico, and the Bahamas, and all those (except Canada) were new to me.

6. What would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007?

And end to the war in Iraq.

7. What dates from 2007 will remain etched in your memory, and why?

April 17th - my first date with Michelle; June 3rd - the day that Jim died; November 12th - the day Michelle agreed to spend the rest of her life with me.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

I can't think of one thing - but realizing that I had gained the trust and acceptance of the people with whom I live and work. And hearing one individual telling me that I had exceeded his expectations for what an intern could do was very rewarding.

9. What was your biggest failure?

Rather than thinking of one specific instance - I learned over the course of this year, that I was not always speaking the truth. Rather, I was deferring to those who seemed wiser or had more experience. And on several occasions, that led to some disasters down the road, that might have been circumvented, if I'd spoken up in the first place. Learning to better trust my instincts is one of my goals for 2008.

10. Did you suffer from illness or injury?

I developed migraines this year. Yuck. In the midst of trying to sort those out, I discovered food allergies - Dairy and Egg. Blech. I love Dairy. And I love Eggs.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

I new MacBook - with 2 gig of RAM and a huge hard drive. YAY!

12. Whose behaviour merited celebration?

My church's, as it took on the Millennium Development Goals with seriousness.

13. Whose behaviour made you appalled or depressed?

My country's and my president's.

14. Where did most of your money go?

For gasoline. Now, I must say, that while this statement is factually true, if I lived anywhere else in the world, even more of my money would have gone for gasoline, so this isn't really a complaint. It's simply reality.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

The fact that more and more people seem to coming to an understanding about climate change and our responsibility to do something about it.

16. What song will always remind you of 2007?

Save the Last Dance for Me

17. Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder? b) thinner or fatter? c) richer or poorer?

Happier, Thinner, and Poorer - but I'll take best 2 out of 3.

18. What do you wish you had done more of?

Relaxed. Read fun novels. Played. I spent much of this year working way too hard.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?

Goofed off on the internet. Attended meetings.

20. How did you spend Christmas?

With my Mama and with our good friends (and my colleagues) Manuel and Peggy.

21. Did you fall in love in 2007?

Yes, and it was absolutely wonderful.

22. What was your favourite TV program?

I'm not much of a TV watcher, but I take some delight in watching Ninja Warrior on G-4 and cheering on those who are challenging themselves with that course.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you did not hate at this time last year?

I try very hard not to hate. It's not an emotion I feel comfortable with. But there are some people who evoke strong feelings of dislike in me. When I can, I do try to effect reconciliation. That being said, there is a person I find terribly difficult and whom I avoid at all costs.

24. What was the best book you read?

I read a number of great books. Certainly Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows was wonderful - I read it twice, because it was so good. I also adored Eat, Pray, Love and A Thousand Splendid Suns.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?

Michelle turned me on to Joel Plaskett Emergency. I'm not sure that I'd call them a musical discovery, but I really like them. And, they have some really rockin' hummin' tunes that you'll find bopping around in your head.

26. What did you want and get?

A wonderful woman to love. A dog. A computer that works.

27. What did you want, and not get?

An end to this senseless war.

28. What was your favourite film of this year?

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. In a more serious vein, I thought that Blood Diamond was wonderful.

29. What did you do for your birthday, and how old were you?

I had dinner with my friend Ginny. I turned 41.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

This year was actually quite satisfying. I met the girl of my dreams. I do work I love. I enjoy my life on most days. It's hard for me to imagine one thing whose magical application would make my life immeasurably more satisfying.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007?

Blue jeans.

32. What kept you sane?

Michelle.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Barak Obama. But not in that schoolgirl crush kind of way, which is what the word "fancy" makes me think of. Rather, I believe the man has integrity. Or, at least as much integrity as you can manage to hold on to and be a political candidate in the year 2008.

34. What political issue stirred you the most?

Climate change. Global poverty. Consumerism.

35. Who did you miss?

Jim Kelsey. But in terms of those who simply live where I don't get to see them very often, but thankfully get to email, and chat with and see periodically: the residents of Wayfarer House.

36. Who was the best new person you met?

Michelle - and the very interesting group of people that she hangs out with.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007.

Life is short and we do not have too much time to gladden the hearts of those who travel the way with us - so make haste to love and be swift to be kind. This was one of Jim's favourite blessings. I think it makes good sense. It's a good idea to make sure that the folks you love know that you love them.

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

"Hey Good lookin' Why the frown?

It always looks better when it's upside down,

You say you got nowhere that you're going to

Can I go nowhere with you?"

-From "Nowhere with You" by Joel Plaskett Emergency

It was a good year. But I shed alot of tears, too. Grief sucks. And I'm still in the midst of it. We sang this song alot. And it always made me laugh, even in the midst of tears.

book pushing

2008-01-08T21:26:00.000-05:00

I've been doing a great deal of reading, what else do you do in the winter in the UP. And actually, some of what I've "read" I've listened to in the car. For months after Jim died, I didn't have the concentration for audio books; all I could manage was some nice, soothing folk music. Or loud, pounding rock. But not a plot of any kind.

But, thankfully, that's changed. So, let me make three very different recommendations for your reading pleasure.

(1) A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini. Set in Afghanistan, this novel spans several generations, and begins sometime in the late 1960s, and ends in the present day. The writing is clear and concise, the story is gripping, and the characters will grab your heart and break it a few times. I've not read The Kite Runner, which is Hosseini's first novel (or, perhaps his first one released here?), but it's not on my list. I listened to this one with a sense of real foreboding. Tragedy is around every corner in this book, but Hosseini creates such empathy that I really fell in love with the women in his novel. Additionally, the novel taught me much about Afghanistan. I know there is a danger about learning about contemporary politics from a novel, but if the novel reflects the contemporary situation in any way, then it's no wonder that the situation there is such a mess. And, it's no wonder that they have such hatred for Americans. Read this novel, friends.

(2) Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett. This novel's been around a while, having been written nearly 20 years ago, though it's getting big press, since Mr. Follett finally released the sequel folks have apparently been begging him to write for years. I picked it up about a month ago at the airport, when I finished all my work, unexpectedly, and it looked like the least grim in a series of bad airport newsstand choices. I was so wrong. It's wonderful. Follett has written a novel about 12th century England, and the building of a cathedral in the fictional town of Kingsbridge. It's by turns funny, gripping, and suspenseful. It's a real commitment, weighing in at nearly 1000 pages, but if you like historical fiction, this one is good, and well written. And while I am no British historian, it rings true. It's a real treat. I don't get to sit and read for pleasure much, and I resent the time I'm away from this one.

(3) Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert. This book is some odd combination of travelogue memoir confessional spiritual guide, written by a woman who's about my age. Liz sets out to spend a year in pursuit of pleasure, God and balance, having survived a brutal divorce followed immediately by another broken heart. She realizes that she must get her life in order. So she goes first to Italy to learn Italian (something she has always wanted to do, simply because she finds the language beautiful). Next she heads to the ashram of her guru in India. Finally, she goes to Indonesia, where several years previously, she encountered an Indonesian medicine man who tells her to come back sometime and visit him.

Liz Gilbert reads the audio version herself, which is great, because she's got an ear for accents, and her ability to relay conversations with Richard from Texas or any number of the folks she encounters is worth the price of admission on the audio book. But the book is worth a read, or a listen, for more than this. The questions that she raises about life and love, and the energy that she devotes to her spiritual practice put me to shame. This woman meditates for hours every day. And she's funny. Gut splittingly funny. And poignant. There were times when I was crying so hard that I might have been dangerous, as I was driving down the road. There were also times when she was a bit self-absorbed. But hell, it was her book, so I think she gets the right. I actually ordered the book tonight. Because I liked it so much, after listening to it, that I want to read it. I want to hold it in my hands, and underline things. I want to write quotes down.

And, I certainly want to encourage some of the people I love to read the book.

Getting Hitched

2008-01-01T16:41:00.000-05:00

It's official. Michelle and I are getting married! Or, in the official lingo of the Episcopal Church (gotta love church politics) we're having our "relationship blessed." The date is April 18th, which we love, because we're hopeless romantics, and it happens to be exactly a year and a day after our first date.

And, this picture, posted here, was taken exactly thirty seconds after I asked her and she said yes. (You've got to love the wonders of modern technology - I had a digital camera in my pocket, have a blog, and the whole world - or at least our friends scattered hither and yon - can share our joy!)

So, save the date. And given our seriously limited financial resources, look for an e-vite coming soon!

Winter Wonderland

2007-12-29T10:55:00.001-05:00

This year, we are finally having a real UP winter. It actually started snowing in November, as it should. I haven't measured yet, but I bet the total snow accumulation is over 75 inches. Presently, at least two feet are on the ground in Houghton, with a bit less in Ontonagon.

The best part, though, is that we've been able to enjoy it. Michelle bought me snowshoes for Christmas, and we've been walking Bird-dog nearly every afternoon after work. And, yesterday, we went cross-country skiing for the first time this winter. It felt great to get out there and move. On Boxing Day (12/26), I drove to Duluth to see my friend Marlene, and even did some snowshoeing over there.

When I was younger, I always thought of winter as this totally desolate time, but what I see now is that it is beautiful. It's a different kind of beauty from the wild and exuberant beauty of summer, for sure, but it is beautiful, nonetheless. The light in the woods yesterday afternoon was simply spectacular, and it took my breath away. We were skiing in the late afternoon, and as it grew closer to dusk, it seemed as though the snow as actually glowing with a kind of pinkish light. It was simply lovely.

Buy cards of Frannie's art!

2007-11-17T19:11:00.001-05:00

Michelle did all the research, and found a great site where we can put our art online. Please check it out. All you have to do is click on one of these little thumbnails pics, and it will take you right to RedBubble. I know that most of you aren't in a place where you've got tons of cash to spare. But, I do hope that you'll check out my art. Some of my favourite pictures are there. I'm continuing to add work, so keep checking back.

The Year of Magical Thinking

2007-11-14T22:59:00.000-05:00

Run, do not walk to your nearest bookstore to pick this one up.

Joan Didion has been a legend to me, for about 16 years. At the bookstore, when we hired new staff, we always gave a book quiz. It separated the run of the mill readers from the literati. And there were always a few titles on the list that I never expected anyone to know. Slouching Towards Bethlehem by Joan Didion was one of them.

Her new book (relatively - and certainly new to me) tells the story of the year that begin in late December 2003, and ends one year later. It starts the night her husband, John Gregory Dunne dies of a heart attack, while having dinner. Simultaneously, their only daughter, Quintana Roo Dunne, just a month younger than I, is struggling for her life. One health crisis after another consumes her.

And Didion lays it all bare. She shares the grief. The magical thinking (like not giving away John's shoes, as he'll need them when he comes back). The heartache of having to tell her daughter three different times that her father is dead. (She was in a coma when he died, then she relapsed and forgot, then she had a brain hemorrhage, and lost the information again).

As I continue to struggle with my own grief over Jim's death, and I as I watch the diocese struggle with it's grief, this book spoke to me.

What are you reading?

2007-09-10T15:15:00.000-04:00

This post was totally inspired by Suzanne and I thought it might give you a glimpse of what I'm up to these days. Most of my reading is professional, but I read some fic on the internet, so I am getting some relaxing reading in somewhere.

1. God and Empire: Jesus Against Rome, Then and Now by John Dominic Crossan. A gift from Sare, this one has been on my shelf for months, but I finally picked it up as preparation for a retreat I'm co-leading at the end of the month. Crossan provided a history of the intersection between the Roman empire, the homeland Jews of Jesus' time, and the early church. He undertakes this examination (as I understand it) in order to explore how the contemporary US Govt. acts like an empire (and has for 150 years) and what the implications are for Christian Americans. I think I'm going to love it - the centrality of justice and the need for Christians to work to bring about God's justice and God's kingdom are passions for me.

2. Opening the Prayerbook by Jeffry Lee. Lee, writing this volume as part of the New Church's Teaching Series, examines the history and context of the prayerbook and the theologies that contributed to the 1979 (most recent) Book of Common Prayer. He places many of the prayerbook services in context. I'm reading this one with the Ministry Support Team at the Church of the Holy Innocents in Little Lake.

3. Preaching What We Practice: Proclamation and Moral Discernment by David Schlafer and Timothy F. Sedgwick. I began this book on vacation, before I headed out to spend a week with Tim (the author) and his wife Martha. He'd given it to me last spring (BJD - Before Jim Died) and I didn't read much in those first few months. I wanted to be able to talk about it with him. The book is well-written and makes a strong case for preachers to preach moral discernment, in order to help those in the pews make sense of (and take action regarding) much of what is happening in the US today.

4. The Message: Daily Reading Bible and The Message//Remix by Eugene Peterson. Having not completed absolutely every reading assignment in seminary (I know, you're shocked) I thought it might be time to read the bible again. I got a cool audio version for my iPod, which breaks the bible up into manageable daily reading chunks (though I tend to listen to several at a time). The Message is a contemporary translation by a guy named Eugene Peterson. I'm really enjoying it so far - though I'm only in Genesis....

5. LifeCycles by the LifeCycles Team (of which I am a member, now!). LifeCycles is the adult formation program in the Diocese of Northern Michigan. Two groups I work with are presently working with it. The Ironwood Ministry Support Team began Cycle I, Unit 1 last week, and the Iron River Ministry Support Team returned to LifeCycles after a multi-year hiatus. They are working on Cycle I, Unit 3.

6. Celtic Benediction: Morning and Night Prayer by J. Philip Newell. I'm not so much reading this one as using it for morning prayer (at least I am when I actually find time for morning prayer - true confessions, here!).

7. Blogs. Back BJD, I read blogs really regularly. Not random ones, though that can be fun. But mostly, with a couple of exceptions, the blogs of people I know and love, who live someplace other than here. It's been a way to keep up. To know what they're thinking about and what they're up to. It's one of the routines that simply vanished in the weeks after Jim died. But I'm sort of regaining my equillibrium, and I'm back to blogs. I don't read them every day, but I do try to check in a few times per week. For a list of the blogs I read, see the right sidebar of this blog. I don't know Fr. Jake and I don't know the WTFWJD woman (though I sure wish I did, she's fun) but all the other folks are people I love and miss.

Fall Comes to the UP

2007-08-30T09:46:00.001-04:00

I'd forgotten, even though it totally threw me last year. Fall comes fast and early. In Massachusetts (and Virginia, too, I think) August is the hottest month. But here, the autumn arrives swiftly. I'd say that fully half of the trees are turning. And the air is cool. Some leaves have even fallen from the trees. I love the fall, and the cooler air, and the beauty that takes my breath away. But it's always a shock to have the green begin to vanish. And knowing what I know now about how long it will be until they return, I'm feeling a bit melancholy about their early departure.

I LOVE this book

2007-08-30T01:54:00.000-04:00

My dear friend Suzanne can always be counted on to find the coolest internet quizzes. I love this quiz, as it speaks to my book-selling and book-loving soul. And how cool is the result? I LOVED Watership Down when I was a tween. I read it several times, and found it captivating. I'm a little nervous about the talking to rabbits part, but I guess I'll go with it.

You're Watership Down!

by Richard Adams

Though many think of you as a bit young, even childish, you're
actually incredibly deep and complex. You show people the need to rethink their
assumptions, and confront them on everything from how they think to where they
build their houses. You might be one of the greatest people of all time. You'd
be recognized as such if you weren't always talking about talking rabbits.

Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

Frannie returns to blogland

2007-07-27T11:20:00.000-04:00

I know I've been pretty quiet in the last eight weeks. All I can say is that it's been a long road. Grief is so energy-sapping. And the work left to do has been all-consuming. But I am starting to see some light and to feel more like myself again, both of which are very good things.

Warning: This part contains spoilers for Harry Potter and the Half-blood Prince (Book 6) - do not read if you don't want to know serious plot details:
In news that won't ber a surprise to those who know me, I've been reading Harry Potter this week. I began by re-reading The Halfblood Prince (Book 6). I was struck, at the end of the book, after Dumbledore is murdered, by how well J.K. Rowling wrote grief. I really resonated with how the staff and students at Hogwarts responded to the news of Dumbledore's death. Her descriptions of the pain, the confusion, and the denial, all rang so true to me.

There are a number of reasons why Harry Potter has become such a phenomenon and I'm not going to expound on them all. The reason that interests me, in this post, has to do with how well she captures the human condition. Her characterizations, her descriptions, and the ways that these characters respond ring true to me. Rowling gets it. And she writes it well.

I've got some backlogged things that I'll be posting in the next few days. I've got a few sermons that I've written in the time I've been away from my blog that I'd love to share. And I have a very long piece that I wrote for our Junior/Senior Camp for a talk that I gave there (that Jim was to have given) on friendship that I want to post, as well.

Thanks for checking back, despite the lack of new postings in such a long period of time.

James Arthur Kelsey, RIP

2007-06-07T10:33:00.000-04:00

MARQUETTE, MI —The world became a darker place with the passing of James Arthur Kelsey.

James Arthur Kelsey James gained love and respect from everyone he met in his professional and personal life. James spent his life giving — giving of his time, his heart, and his soul to help anyone and everyone in need. His levels of compassion and kindness were unparalleled. A courageous man, willing to stand up for his beliefs. James Kelsey was the benchmark to which great men are judged. Not only a great man, but a great husband and father. There was no better model for how to be a truly wonderful human being than the one he provided for his sons and daughter.

If the world were full of more men like James Arthur Kelsey, it would be a wonderful place. Sadly, today we find ourselves with one less.

James Arthur Kelsey was born August 27, 1952, along with twin brother Stephen, in Baltimore, Md., to parents Arthur Corson Kelsey and Louise Martien. James, who liked to be called Jim, attended schools in New York City and Burlington, Vt. He graduated from Ithaca College in New York in 1974 with a Bachelor's Degree in Philosophy. In 1976 while at General Theological Seminary, he fell in love and married Mary Cruse.

After graduating from General Theological Seminary in 1977, Jim was called to be Deanery Curate for four congregations in southwestern Vermont. Following his ordination to the priesthood in 1978, he was called to be the rector of Holy Trinity Church in Swanton and priest-in-charge of three missions which gradually evolved into an eight-point cluster over the next seven years. During his year at Holy Trinity, his interest in collaborative ministry deepened. A non-hierarchal form of leadership emerged there, which included a locally ordained priest and a team of persons who shared ministry support responsibilities. Holy Trinity was recognized by the national church as one of ten effective congregations highlighted in the publication Against All Odds, prepared for the 1982 General Convention.

In 1985 Jim answered a call by the Diocese of Oklahoma to help establish a diocesan-wide strategy for cluster ministries. His work there focused especially with eight congregations in a six-county area in east-central Oklahoma. He began an extensive consulting role on collaborative ministry throughout the U.S. and Canada.

Jim and Mary, along with their children, moved to the Upper Peninsula for his new role as Ministry Development Coordinator in the Diocese of Northern Michigan in 1989. He felt an affinity immediately with the U.P., as it reminded him of his summers in Vermont as a youth. This position he held until his election as Bishop in 1999.

Since coming to the diocese, over half of the diocese's 27 congregations have embraced Mutual Ministry, as collaborative ministry is known in Northern Michigan. It is characterized by the commissioning of local Ministry Support Teams supported by seminary-trained regional missioners. Interest in Mutual Ministry by other dioceses in the U.S. and abroad led Northern Michigan and has brought visitors to the Diocese from all around the world, hungry for a first-hand look at this model for ministry.

Jim's consulting work over the years expanded overseas to include New Zealand and the United Kingdom and has touched over thirty-five dioceses in the United States. He participated in numerous national and international networks and training programs, including the Leadership Academy in New Directions (LAND), Sindicators, Synagogy, Coalition 14, an International Symposium on Local Collaborative Ministry, and together with his colleagues, initiated an educational resource for community formation, called LifeCycles. He was also a founding leader of "Living Stones," a lively multi-diocesan community of ministry developers.

During successive General Conventions, Jim chaired and participated in various committees, speaking passionately on issues around the ministry of all the baptized. Through his hard work and collaboration with others, significant changes were made to the national church Canons. Most recently, in recognition of his "prophetic leadership in supporting the baptismal ministry of all Episcopalians and for the Diocese's work in helping to transform congregations from being communities gathered around a minister to ministering communities,"

Jim was honored at the Episcopal Divinity School with a Doctor of Divinity, honoris causa on May 17, 2007.

Jim was the Bishop Protectorate for the Society of St. Francis, Province of the Americas, and was himself a Third Order Franciscan, who was steadfastly working to follow the path of St. Francis. He was deeply committed to peace and justice issues and protecting the environment. He was a member of the Bishops for a Just Society and one of the founding leaders of the ecumenical group Earth Keepers.

Jim loved music and films, learning new technologies and perhaps best of all the New York Yankees.

James Arthur Kelsey is survived by his wife, Mary Kelsey of Marquette; three children, Nathan Kelsey of Johnston, Iowa, Lydia Kelsey and her fiance, Jared Bowman of North Liberty, Iowa, and Amos Kelsey of Mackinac Island; his mother, Louise Kelsey of Easthampton, Mass.; two sisters, Ann Lammers of Peterborough, N.H., and Meg (Jonathan) Wright of Florence, Mass.; one twin brother, Steve (Kathy Barrett) Kelsey of Durham, Conn.; father- and mother-in-law, John and Shirley Cruse of West Des Moines, Iowa; brothers-in-law, John (Patty) Cruse of Madison, Wis., and Fred (JoAnn) Cruse of New Glarus, Wis.; sisters-in-law, Hildy Smith of West Des Moines, Iowa, Gail (Ed) Cudworth of Urbandale, Iowa, and Katy Andreen of Des Moines, Iowa; also surviving are numerous nieces and nephews. He was preceded in death by his father, Arthur Kelsey.

Visitation will be on Friday from 9 a.m. to 1 p.m. at St. Paul 's Episcopal Church in Marquette. A Memorial Eucharist will be held at St. Michael's Catholic Church in Marquette at 4 p.m. EDT Friday with the Rt. Rev. Bruce Caldwell, bishop of Wyoming, presiding. Memorials are preferred in Bishop Kelsey's memory to the Page Conference Center c/o Episcopal Diocese of Northern Michigan, 131 E. Ridge St., Marquette, MI 49855 .Bishop Kelsey's obituary can also be viewed at www.canalefuneral.com where relatives and friends may leave a note of remembrance.The Canale-Tonella Funeral Home of Marquette is assisting the family with arrangements.

Broken Hearted

2007-06-07T10:25:00.000-04:00

Sarah and I were on vacation. We'd spent the day, in clerical collars, marching in Buffalo's gay pride parade. We'd started planning how to spend the rest of the week, painting the living room, hiking Niagra gorge, having dinner with her Mama. The opening credits had just rolled on Memoirs of a Geisha when my cell phone rang.

I knew something was terribly wrong if Manuel was calling me on my vacation. His news: that our bishop, Jim Kelsey, had been killed in a car accident several hours previously. I told him I was coming home. Sarah, officially the best friend ever, came with me. We drove 14.5 hours back to the UP on Monday (only 48 hours after I'd driven 14.5 hours to Buffalo).

We're all in shock. We're all grieving. Our hearts are broken.

Jim's funeral will be tomorrow (Friday, June 8, at 4pm).

Sermon, Easter 7

2007-05-21T12:13:00.000-04:00

I know, I've been gone for weeks, and suddenly, I'm the mad poster. But most of this stuff was already done and just WAITING for me to post. So here goes. I was quite pleased with the final results of this one.

20 May 2007 Iron River/Houghton

In today’s reading from the Gospel of John, Jesus prays that all may be one. For weeks now, we’ve been hearing a conversation between him and his close followers, but today, the mood changes. Instead of a discourse or a dialogue, we are privileged to eavesdrop on Jesus’ prayer. He stops talking to the disciples, and begins talking to his Father.

And the first thing that he asks God to do in that prayer is to help all to be one, as he and his Father are one. He’s not just praying for his friends gathered at the table. Nor is he praying only for those followers who have been with him on his journey. He is praying for ALL to be one. Jesus asks God to make one his close friends and all those who will come to believe in him through their words and witness.

One of the amazing things about this prayer is that it ties together all of us who have come to believe in Jesus. When Jesus prays that all will be one in this way, it covers everyone from his early followers, throughout the ages and generations, to us today and beyond us to our children and grandchildren. When Jesus says ALL, he means ALL.

Much has been made, in recent years, of the various and sundry ways that Christians are divided. Are we progressives or fundamentalists? Are we Baptists? Methodists? Roman Catholics? Lutherans? Are we Anglicans or Episcopalians?
Does our worship represent primacy of scripture or of sacrament?

As some of you know, I was in Virginia this week. On the plane coming home, working on this very sermon, I met an Evangelical man who, when he heard that I was an Episcopalian, began to engage me in conversation. While he was gracious about it, his agenda was to make sure that I understood that his church interpreted scripture correctly and that ours seemed to miss the boat.

Perhaps our disagreements are more local, hinging around questions of church governance, music, or forms of worship. Certainly in my forty plus years of church membership, I’ve witnessed more church arguments at this local level than great arguments over who’s in or out.

The truth is, with very little difficulty, we can name a hundred ways that we are separated one from another, and yet still call ourselves Christian. And we could throw up our hands in despair because we somehow seem to be failing at this directive of Jesus. Except, that “may they all be one” is not a directive. It is Jesus’ prayer on our behalf. It’s the thing that he is asking God to accomplish on our behalf, not something that we are entirely responsible for.

I don’t know about you, but I have found questions of unity to be particularly troubling in recent months within our own Episcopal Church/Anglican Communion. Will there be schism? Will there be separation? Will the US Church get booted out of the family?

This week in Virginia, I spent time with Kathy Grieb, one of my favourite professors at Virginia Theological Seminary. Kathy teaches Greek and New Testament at VTS, and she was part of the Covenant Design Team that met in January, attempting to craft a covenant that might keep all of us at the Anglican Table.

Several months later, Kathy spoke to the US House of Bishops, essentially blowing the whistle about how skewed the process was. In the end, while I think that Kathy finds some things useful about the idea of covenant, she was not at all wild about the way the chips seem to be falling in this particular process.

On Friday, a group of friends, including Kathy, gathered for coffee and dessert. Kathy talked with us for several hours about her views on the church and the implications for what might happen as we move forward. It was amazing to hear her lay out implications and to talk about her passion for mission.

I actually jettisoned the first draft of this sermon after that conversation, as I made the connection between what Kathy had to say about the church and mission and how these things might relate to Jesus’ prayer on our behalf that we all might be one.

Certainly there are those who would like to see us all one as Jesus and the Father are one in some sort of cookie cutter, uniform way. In this view, there is a single entity who describes what is orthodox (right belief) and orthopraxis (right behaviour/practice). And those of us who fail to conform to those beliefs and practices will be left behind.

In the history of the church, this sort of line drawing has happened repeatedly.

But there is another kind of one-ness that seems possible to me, one that is not based in either orthodoxy or orthopraxis.

This one-ness comes out of the teachings of Jesus. In these last weeks, as Jesus prepared his disciples for his departure from them, he reminded them that others would know them by their love for one another. And he said that they could recognize other lovers of God based on those who kept His word.

In this vein, I’d like to share a story that Kathy told us on Friday night.

She said that back in the early 1980s, there was a US cathedral that had a mission relationship with a diocese in the Pacific Islands. The Episcopal Church had begun ordaining women; the Pacific Island Anglicans thought that ordaining women was a terrible idea. What to do? What would become of that mission-connection? Would the connection be severed over disagreements in church practice?

Well, apparently representatives from the cathedral travelled to that diocese. Each party acknowledged the difference of opinion. They shook hands and then the two sides got down to work literally building a church and building relationships. Their unity of purpose, of spreading the gospel, of behaving as Jesus behaved seemed far more crucial to them than some sort of lock-step orthodoxy.

Today, we have that same opportunity. We may or may not all agree. But we have the opportunity to demonstrate our one-ness not by conformity to one side’s view of orthodoxy, but by our commitment to living out the gospel. This town, this county, this nation, and our world are all filled with people who are hungry, thirsty, naked, homeless, addicted, oppressed and/or in need of the Good News of Jesus Christ. The gospel calls us to act for justice.

Scripture provides us with a variety of texts that can be interpreted in a host of ways, speaking to issues of morality and behaviour. It is unwavering in it’s directives that we are to act for justice.
We can show ourselves open to the unity that Jesus prayed for by caring less about whether we agree on the issues that threaten to divide us and caring a great deal more about the amazing work we can accomplish together coming out of acting for justice.

Rather than throwing up our hands in despair about the conservatism or liberalism of our perceived enemies, we can form partnerships with those with whom we disagree theologically, in order to act for justice.

Kathy told us on Friday night that she’s heard a number of liberal Americans say, “Well, they say they don’t approve of us, yet they are happy to take our money.” And she has heard African bishops say, “We won’t take money from sinners.” No one is served by this type of mentality, least of all, God.

I find little hope of us all being one, as Jesus and the Father are one if we think it can be accomplished based on finding some common ground of orthodoxy. I find great hope of our all being one, if we come together in a commitment to serving those in need and acting for justice.

AMEN.

Interview Questions, Round Two

2007-05-21T11:55:00.000-04:00

It seems like weeks ago that Wayfarer sent me some interview questions. Finally, I am getting to them.

1. If you were given the chance to try one day or event in your life over again, what would it be? How might you try it differently?
When I was young and less responsible about the feelings of others, I ended a relationship badly. I was dating a lovely man, whom I would have married had I not finally sorted out that I was a lesbian. My inability to be honest with myself, combined with a certain lack of responsibility, led me to be unfaithful to him. I wish that I'd had the maturity, patience, and self-knowledge to end the relationship first and then enter into that new relationship.

2. What is your favorite form of entertainment that is NOT movies, television, music or books (I put the last one in there to make it a little tougher)?
Tough call. Games, I think. I love to be outdoors, hiking, photographing, enjoying, but I think of that less as entertainment somehow. And, the reality is that I could play games for days. Truly.

3. What is the greatest single challenge you have overcome in your life?
Loving my mother for who she is. When I was younger, I was very impatient with her and could easily see all of her flaws (conveniently missing my own). But, in the last five years, I've come to see all the complexities that made her who she is. And, I've learned how very lovable she is as a person.

4. What is one thing about you that your friends probably don’t know that would surprise them?
That the hardest food for me to give up, having become a vegetarian is NOT steak, or even pork tenderloin, but the humble hot dog. My father grew up in Aroostook County, Maine (Ashland and Portage); every single Saturday night we ate hot dogs and home made baked beans. Every Saturday. It is my ultimate comfort food. If I'm going to cheat on the vegetarian thing, it will be for hot dogs.

5. Imagine a memorial to you and your life. What would you want it to say? What would you want it to look like? Where would it be located?
I want whatever memorial that is erected to my life when I am gone to be small and to avoid taking up land that might be used for something more important than storing old dead bodies. I'd be happy to have my ashes live in a columbarium in a church, or scattered in a field of flowers.

I think that the most important work that can be done by those of us living on the planet right now is to love. Love deeply. Love everyone, even our enemies. And so I hope that a memorial to me might read something like, "She showed love to all she met." Or even, "We knew ourselves to be beloved by her." I had a friend die young and suddenly several years ago, and Adam's great gift to the world was the love he showed to us all. I hope that I do the same.

Now, here's the deal: It’s your turn! Here’s how it works: Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me” (or send me an email) and I’ll email you five hopefully provocative, entertaining questions. They’ll be different questions from the ones I’ve answered here (that’s the beauty of this!)You update your own blog with the answers to the questions I sent, and include an explanation of how this worked with an offer to interview someone else in the same post.When other people comment on your blog asking to be interviewed, you get to ask them five questions, and the process evolves. It's fun - so try it!

Grammar Maven

2007-05-21T11:42:00.000-04:00

Thanks to Suzanne for pointing me to the cool quiz. Check it out yourself and see if you, too, are the bee's knees when it comes to apotrophes, pronouns, and punctuation.

Your Language Arts Grade: 100%

Way to go! You know not to trust the MS Grammar Check and you know "no" from "know." Now, go forth and spread the good word (or at least, the proper use of apostrophes).

Are You Gooder at Grammar?
Make a Quiz

Sermon, Easter 5

2007-05-05T22:42:00.000-04:00

Fran Gardner 6 May 2007 Easter 5 Ontonagon (and Houghton)

We human beings are good at sorting ourselves into subgroups. We do a nice job of delineating who belongs with us, and who does not. Perhaps we do it by how we dress, by skin colour, or by accent. We divide the world into boxes called counties, states, and nations. We identify strongly with the place of our birth, our national origin, and our ethnic background. And to some degree, this categorizing is natural and it makes sense. This dividing up of our selves into groups we belong to is a way of finding some order in a potentially chaotic world. It gives us identity.

We do the same kind of thing regarding our lives of faith. We identify ourselves as Episcopalians or Methodists. We claim to be followers of Mohammed or the Buddha. We name people as Gentile or Jew.

Today, Jesus tells his followers, “I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” Jesus’ message reminds us that is not how we dress, or what we wear that distinguishes us as Christians. It won’t be the cross we wear around our necks or (as the early disciples used) the sign of the fish that will mark us as Jesus’ followers. It will be the love that we show for one another.

Doing some research on this sermon, I googled a song I sang growing up in the RC church. In the end, the words weren’t quite right, so I opted not to use it. However, while on a Christian lyrics website, I saw a fascinating banner ad.

It offered me clothing that would make me Jesus Branded. This Christian clothing company made T-shirts with scripture passages and catchy graphics. It invited me to wear my faith on my sleeve. As if, somehow, wearing a T-shirt showing me to be a Jesus Ninjette (a truly frightening image, actually) or proclaiming “God is love” would mark me as follower of Jesus.

According to this website, all we have to do to demonstrate our faith as Christians is to be Jesus Branded.

“I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”

It shouldn’t be a surprise that contemporary Christians are confused about what is really important, if we are to follow Jesus. It sure didn’t take Jesus’ followers long to manifest the same confusion. It was shortly after Jesus’ death and resurrection when Peter ran into trouble.

Peter was in Joppa and in a dream was told to bring God’s word to some Gentiles. For most Jews, Gentiles were wholly other. Different. Forbidden. Speaking or eating with Gentiles would make you ritually unclean. This message to bring the Good News to the Gentiles would have been anathema to Peter.

In fact, it’s striking that in Peter’s dream, all of the unclean forbidden animals are roughly equivalent, at least in his mind, with those Gentiles. However, God’s message, and God’s subsequent sending of the Holy Spirit to those same Gentiles, convinced Peter that Jesus’ message was for all people, not some small subset that Peter happened to be a part of.

It was the same thing back in Jerusalem, where the Jewish followers of Jesus really needed some convincing. They were furious, and called Peter to account for his actions, certain that Peter had strayed terribly from the core message of Jesus, which they believed was offered only to the Jews.

“I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”

Left to our own devices, we might be as confused about what this passage means as Jesus’ followers were. We are naturally good at dividing up, drawing lines, marking people as either in or out. It might be hard for us to imagine a world where what truly marks us as Jesus’ followers, the real Jesus Brand if you will, is our capacity to love.

We overuse love. I’m as likely to tell you that I love ice cream, or kayaking, or board games, or my mother. The love that Jesus is talking about here is not Hallmark card love. It’s not the passionate love of lovers. It is the love that leads to action. This love is not a feeling, it’s a choice. This love is radical and world changing.

It’s the sort of love that tells a story where the hero is a Good Samaritan, a hated non-Jew, rather than a priest or temple authority. It’s the kind of love that offers living water to a non-Jewish woman of questionable moral values at Jacob’s well. It’s the kind of love that says, from the cross, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.”

It’s the sort of love that caused Oscar Romero to speak out against the fighting in El Salvador, even knowing that it might (and ultimately did) cost him his life. It’s the sort of love that prompted Rosa Parks to say no to sitting in the back of the bus, despite enormous personal cost, because she could not longer tolerate living in a racially segregated society. It’s the kind of love that allows Desmond Tutu to speak of forgiveness, despite being personally harmed by South African apartheid. It’s the kind of love that allowed members of the Amish community to reach out to the family of the man who murdered their children, rather than to speak of vengeance.

These examples might sound impossible to us. We are, after all, not Romero, Parks, Tutu, or even members of an Amish community. But we are Christians.

It was fashionable several years ago, to wear a bracelet with the letters WWJD. What Would Jesus Do? It’s a question with great potential. It’s a question that has the capacity to lead us to deeper readings of scripture. There was the possibility, with the rise of WWJD, to resensitize a new generation of Christians to the depths of love and compassion that could be reached at every moment of choice we encounter. It could have provided the true Jesus Brand.

Instead, WWJD turned a deep question, worthy of years of reflection, into a sound bite, a bumper sticker, a question with no teeth, prompting snap judgments and lots of behaviour that didn’t appear to be much like what Jesus might actually have done.

In fact, we don’t have to wonder what Jesus would have done. Scripture is filled with the stories of what Jesus actually did. Our tradition is filled with the stories of holy men and women, prompted by love, who did radical things.

Each time we offer love, rather than hate; an open hand, rather than a fist; comfort and consolation, rather than scathing criticism and critique; we do what Jesus would have done. We brand ourselves with the true Jesus Brand.

“I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”

Interview, Round One

2007-05-02T16:43:00.000-04:00

This came to my attention first at Suzanne's Blog, and then at her husband Wayfarer's Blog. I apparently asked them EACH to interview me - so I'll tackle Suzanne's questions first, and then Wayfarer's in the next couple of days.

If you had a day to do anything you wanted to do, with no family or job responsibilities, what would you do?
I would start by sleeping in, that's no shock. But not super-late. Then, I would spend the day outdoors. Hiking, kayaking, picture-taking. The options are endless. I'd pack some good food to eat on the journey. And I would spend the day simply enjoying the beauty that surrounds me here. I've done it a couple of times since moving to the UP, and it's always been a refreshing treat simply to wander about.

You have a one-way ticket to anywhere. Where would you go and why?
At first I thought this was easy, and then I noticed the one-way stipulation. There's no place I'd like to go and not come back here again. But, I would like to really travel in Europe. I don't mean an "If this is Tuesday it must be Paris" sort of tour. I would like to spend three or four months hiking/train traveling around Europe. I want to see the big cathedral and little churches. I want to explore art museums and the great sites of history. I want to eat local foods and drink local drinks. And I want to do it all at a snail's pace, in order to really experience the places where I am. But, I want to come back again.

Who is your favorite 1960s era musician/band, and which of their songs is your favorite? I'm not so much a fan of '60s music. I've been listening, almost exclusively, to the 70s station on XM radio. I was going to choose Queen, and then discovere that they were founded in 1970. ARGH. That having been said, I am partial to both the Beatles and the Rolling Stones. Forced to choose, I'd have to say "The Long and Winding Road" by the Beatles.

You are on a quest and at the end, you will find your heart’s desire. There are two paths you could follow to arrive at your destination. One is a 600-foot long bridge over a deep chasm (think “Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom” – “Hang on lady, we go for a ride”). The other is a subterranean pathway deep underground (you’d get a torch, but nothing else to light your way). Which pathway would you take, and what do you expect to find at the end?
I hate, despise, loathe, and fear heights. So this is no contest. I choose the subterranean pathway. What I would find there would be enough money to make a serious difference in the mission and work of the organizations that I believe in and to live comfortably for the rest of my life, so that I could afford to work for less money at the work that I do. I don't need to be super rich, but I do need to eat, be clothed, etc.

I’ll give you one more question, even though the last one was a two-parter...

You get a phone call from NASA. They need a priest on the next space shuttle mission and they want you. You would have to spend the next 6 months training for the mission, months of intense, grueling physical and emotional work. Do you go?
In one short heartbeat. I'm not one of those people who has a burning desire to go to space, but I love adventure. This appeals to me - if NASA wanted chaplains, I'd sign up!

OK. Now it’s your turn! Here’s how it works:Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me” I’ll email you five hopefully provocative, entertaining questions. There’ll be different questions from the ones I’ve answered here (that’s the beauty of this!)You update your own blog with the answers to the questions I sent, and include an explanation of how this worked with an offer to interview someone else in the same post.When other people comment on your blog asking to be interviewed, you get to ask them five questions, and the process evolves. It's fun - so try it!

New Vestments

2007-05-01T00:40:00.000-04:00

Emily is a junior at Finlandia University, studying fashion design. Her hope is to find work in Liturgical Design. She made these vestments for me, as a class project this spring. The fabric is summer weight hemp. The dyes are environmentally friendly, as are the inks for the prints. The green set is block printed, the red set is screen printed. They are now sewn together and are reversible. I am so pleased and amazed by what she has done. If you want Em to make some vestments for you, let me know and I'll put you in touch with her. Her summer project is a new alb for me! The stoles match the chasubles.

God Hates Shrimp

2007-04-28T00:04:00.000-04:00

Susan's blog, This Passage contains a link to the website God Hates Shrimp. It shows what happens if we take the sort of injunctions found in Leviticus literally. It'll either make you laugh or cry.

From the About this Site section:
As you may have realized, this site is a parody. It is meant to poke fun at people like Fred Phelps, and at people who protest against gay people and gay marriage.
The point we're trying to make is that by using the Old Testament (specifically the book of Leviticus) as a basis for protesting gay marriage, you run into a couple of problems. The first is that in the New Testament, Jesus established the New Covenant, which stated that the old Mosaic laws about unclean things were invalid (Jesus in his own person said nothing specifically against homosexuality, although Paul later attributed some remarks to him). The second reason is that if you still want to quote from Leviticus, despite Jesus' doing away with Mosaic law, then you better be prepared to enforce the whole thing, not just the parts you like. This includes not only the injunction against shellfish and mussels and such, but also against wearing fabrics made of blended fibers, cutting or shaving your beard, sowing mixed seed in a field, and a slew of other things nobody but Orthodox Jews take seriously anymore.

Sermon, Easter 2

2007-04-15T12:54:00.000-04:00

It's good to be back after the Holy Week and Easter hiatus.

I wanted to share this sermon, that evolved in a very non-traditional way. My best friend (and seminary housemate) Sarah woke up early this am to type up her sermon, which had been marinating for days. Her fabulous, but mischievous, kitten Zuko dumped a pint glass of water onto her laptop, effectively destroying it. And so she called me at 4am. Together, we created this sermon, which was so much better than what I'd originally planned to say, that I preached it too. Hope you enjoy it.

Poor old Thomas always gets a bad rap. He’s gone down in history as Doubting Thomas, but he’s just like the rest of us would be in that situation. And it’s not like any of his beloved colleagues completely understood the Resurrection and were waiting at the door for Jesus with their hands on their hips, saying, “Well, it’s about time you showed up! Where you have been?!?”

No, in fact, Thomas was no different from the other disciples; they saw and then believed. Thomas needed his own experience. It doesn’t make him a ‘doubter’. The truth of it is – none of us lives in a vacuum.

Where’ all shaped by the things that happen to us, the things we participate in. This is profound because it means that we are NOT shaped by other people’s experiences, we’re shaped by our own.

That Thomas returned from wherever he was, and the disciples said, “This thing happened to us,” – was not enough for Thomas to be transformed. And, it’s not enough for us, either. We, like Thomas have to have our own experiences.

We can only deeply know, with that sort of knowledge that is in our bones, that knowing that comes from our gut, that knowledge that our hearts can totally embrace – we can only deeply know what we have experienced – some how, some way experienced to be true ourselves.

You see this everywhere.

You see this in the situation that was so funny when you were there, first hand, experiencing it, and yet – as you try to retell it, recapture it, as you try to describe the experience to someone else – it’s not the same. It’s not as funny. Sort of recreating the entire scenario for them, it’s just not the same. And it’s not the same, because humor is one of those things that requires a lot of understanding based on previous experience, and humor is itself experiential. As they say, “if you have to explain the joke, it’s not funny anymore.”

Experience.

Experience is the key to relationships, as well. Take cousins, for example. I have a number of cousins, but I’m not really close to any of them. That is because we’ve not had very many shared experiences. Now, my cousins are blood relations, and I’ve inherited a connection to them that few other people in this world are privileged to, but that doesn’t mean too much to me.

With only one exception, I simply don’t know them from a hole in the wall. I don’t dislike them, mind, but neither could I describe my feelings for them as love. My feelings for these cousins are pretty much neutral. I feel this way because we don’t have a relationship together - we never did.

Relationship isn’t something you can compel. You can put yourself in proximity to it. If you want to have a relationship with someone, you spend time with them. If you want to have a relationship with someone, you make yourself available to them, you have fun with them. You see, we’re back to experience.

The surest way to kill a relationship is to cut off the flow of experiences – to neglect the relationship and the person, or thing you’re having a relationship with, be that a friend, a partner, a project you are working on, your studies at school, or a new creative inspiration you just had.

So, what does all of this have to do with our friend Thomas? It seems to me that all the sermons in the world, all the stories, all the poetry, all the music only takes us so far. Sermons and stories and music and poetry are all ways of coming into proximity with God, but the rest is up to us. We need to experience God for ourselves, just like Thomas. At some level, for this thing called faith in God to take, we need to have experiences of God.

Now, these can happen in a variety of ways, and despite the fact that we need to have experiences as Thomas needed to have an experience, it doesn’t mean our experience is going to look exactly like his.

Depending on who we are and what we need, our experience of God is going to be different. It could be through the sermon, or the music, or the readings, yes. It could be through the bread and the wine. It could be at prayer, it could be in the eyes of the people we serve, when we get out into the community and help other people. It could be in the eyes of the people who help us, who show us spontaneous love. It could be during a walk on the beach or watching a sunset. It could happen when we least expect it. Really, it could be… anything.

But it needs to be something, because we can inherit religion, but we can’t inherit a relationship with God. That, each one of us needs to forge for ourselves. There are relationships that come down through history and land themselves in our laps, but for them to be anything but in name only, that relationship needs to be backed by experience.

And the good news is that God, our Beloved, is ‘here with only a thin membrane between us, and all it takes is a call from our lips, a whisper with no sound, for that veil,” that thin veil, to disappear.

Manager of The World....

2007-03-28T14:25:00.000-04:00

This may be funnier to those of you from Western Mass....

The Episcopal Church publishes a biennial clergy directory. In some circles, I've heard it called The Stud Book because it lists parents, children, spouses (current and former!), etc. It also lists former positions.

As most of you know, I spent twelve years managing The World Eye Bookshop - the world's second best job - an independent bookstore in Greenfield, MA.

Today, I received the form toupdate my listing in the directory. It's filled with bits of trivia (like my father's middle name). And, it lists my former employment as Manager of The World from 1991 - 2003. OK. That's pretty cool. But, I'm feeling a bit like a slacker. You'd think I could have done something about poverty, AIDS, sexism, homophobia, or at least poison ivy while I was in charge, eh? It's been making me giggle for the last hour.

The language mishap reminds me of another more serious one. The headline in the Greenfield Recorder (our local paper) on January 8, 1996 created some confusion and fear. The headline, in about 40 point font read: Inferno Destroys World Eye. A fire on January 7, 1996 gutted our building; only our cat, a few metal shelves, and (miraculously) the computer's hard drive survived. We later learned that a woman visiting the area for the first time was thrown into momentary terror by the headline, fearing that some some cataclysmic event in space had imperiled the planet.

The store was named by its founder - who thought that books were your eye to the world around you - but the name has caused issues periodically. This latest one is the most amusing. I'm submitting my changes electronically so that I can keep the paper listing me as the manager of the world. It might come in handy sometime when I need to be excused from a nasty meeting or a parking ticket. (Don't I get some consideration here? I used to be the manager of the world!)

What I had to cut from my sermon

2007-03-17T23:03:00.000-04:00

All across the diocese this weekend, congregations are joining together to pray for peace. We have added litanies for peace and special prayers of the people to our services. Many of us will use a Eucharistic prayer with a theme for peace. And, we divided up the names of all of the US servicemen and women who have died in Iraq, and each congregation will pray for about 150 of them by name.

All that is to say that I wrote what seemed like a great introduction to my sermon and then realized that with all the other stuff in the service, my sermon needs to be shorter, rather than longer. So, as I was quite pleased with my reflection, I wanted somebody to read it. Here goes:

There are certain events in this country's history that are iconic. These events have had such a profound impact on our national consciousness, that they are permanently burned into our collective memory.

I have yet to meet a person who was over the age of five when President Kennedy was shot who could not tell me precisely where he or she was when they heard the news of his assassination. Many can describe the days that followed his shooting, and what they did.

The same is true for the September 11th attacks. Nearly all of us can tell the story of where we were and what we were doing when the news of that terrible morning became known. I myself was in a meeting at the local Chamber of Commerce. One of the office staff came in, looking stricken, and turned on the television. We were all surprised, as we were working on a project. When Marian explained that a plane had struck one of the towers, we stopped to watch, and like many, saw the second plane hit. Shock. Fear. Tears. All work ceased, as we remained glued to the television. The whole day took on a strange character. The bookstore was crowded, but not with people who were shopping. Instead, people came in to talk.

There are two other moments that are also burned into my consciousness. This country has declared war twice in my adult lifetime. And in both cases, I had been hoping and praying that diplomacy would win out. The news of both Operation Desert Storm and the War in Iraq were bitter disappointments.

On January 16, 1991, I was in Sylvester's bar in Northampton, MA - having dinner with friends. The lively bar scene grew suddenly quiet as all TVs filled with the image of news commentators announcing that "the liberation of Kuwait has begun." I remember sitting in stunned silence. I remember shock, fear, and tears that night, as well.

In March 2003, I was at Virginia Theological Seminary, interviewing for admission. I was visiting with the one student I knew, when she suddenly burst into tears. The war in Iraq had begun, she told me. I was crushed. That evening, I joined members of the community in the chapel to pray.

Ironically, on Thursday in Ironwood, we were watching a video of the Archbishop of Canterbury, ++Rowan Williams; it was filmed in April of 2003. It might be premature, he told the audience, to talk of a great victory in Iraq, at this point. How right he proved to be, in this regard.

OK - must finish my sermon - the one I'm preaching in about 12 hours!

Could it be... Spring?

2007-03-13T23:29:00.000-04:00

It's been downright balmy here in the UP over the last few days. It was, honest to God, 70 degrees today in Marquette. I walked around all day with no jacket on. Hooray!

Snow is melting, and small creatures are starting to appear. The bad news: I've killed two wee rodents - perhaps chipmunks - in the last few days, as they've been scampering about with abandon and not paying any attention to the big cars on the road!

I also saw another eagle, close up. It was eating something dead in the ditch, and flew up beside me as I drove past.

Last week, I learned to snow shoe, great fun. There was still plenty of snow, so we walked on the beach by my house for 2.5 hours. It was great. Both yesterday and today I've had brisk walks, enjoying the warmth and the sun.
The bad news is that it's supposed to be back to twenty, or so, by the morning. We'll see.

It must be quiz week!

2007-03-07T09:42:00.000-05:00

Sue sent this quiz link along. Apparently my intelligence style is Interpersonal Intelligence. It's not as sexy as, say, artistic or kinesthetic, but I guess I must be in the right line of work, eh?

Your Dominant Intelligence is Interpersonal Intelligence

You shine in your ability to realate to and understand others.Good at seeing others' points of view, you get how people think and feel.You have an uncanny ability to sense true feelings, intentions, and motivations.A natural born leader, you are great at teaching and mediating conflict.
You would make a good counselor, salesperson, politician, or business person.

http://www.blogthings.com/whatkindofintelligencedoyouhavequiz/">What Kind of Intelligence Do You Have?

Sermon for Lent 2

2007-03-06T17:38:00.000-05:00

I meant to post this yesterday, but I thought that two new posts in one day was plenty. The fascinating part, for me, was that I preached this in Iron River - the most conservative congregation I work with. I didn't feel like I had too much choice about that - the word came, and I preached it.

After the service, the woman I'd heard was most conservative met me in the receiving line and said, "Thank you for your sermon. I really appreaciated it." My articulate response was, "Really?" And she said, "Yes, You've really opened my eyes to [and here she dropped her voice] gay people. I mean, I've never thought about [and here, she whispered, sort of like those older women who can't say cancer out loud] lesbians like that before." Now, friends, I confess that I wimped out. I didn't ask her in WHAT way. I decided that she'd already taken enough of a step.

So, here it is:

When I first read this morning's gospel, I was touched by the behavior of the Pharisees. It seemed to me that they were doing a nice thing. They were coming to Jesus, telling him that he was in danger, and that he should head out of town before harm came to him. It was a level of care and concern that I had not previously noticed from the Pharisees.

But, the more I thought about the passage, the more suspicious I grew of their good behaviour. After all, the Pharisees -- and there are a couple of notable exceptions -- were not a collection of people who seemed particularly concerned with Jesus or his well-being.... Unless, of course, it impacted them. Then, they were concerned, not for Jesus, but for their own safety and security.

So, what's really going on in this passage? Why does it appear in the lectionary during Lent? What does it say to us on our Lenten journey?

To give the Pharisees a little credit, they were in a tough spot. They were stuck between the temple and the Roman leaders. In this time of social upheaval and foreign invasion, they located the idea of salvation in getting their religious practices right. They were the ones who were concerned with the right practice of the Jewish religion and putting forward a proper appearance. Their strong motivator was to keep the Roman invaders off the backs of the Jewish faithful. So, their behaviour was not entirely selfish. But, in the passage that we hear this morning, it seems that these Pharisees, were not so much about trying to protect Jesus from Herod, as they were trying to protect the faith and the faithful from the volatile Roman invaders. Their motivator was to get this radical troublemaker Jesus the heck out of Dodge!

Remember, that from the beginning of his ministry, Jesus placed the needs and best interests of the poor, the hungry, the oppressed, the victimized, and the imprisoned at the forefront. Particularly in Luke's gospel, he talks repeatedly about overthrowing authority and finding justice for the poor. THAT kind of talk was treason to the Romans - which is why we find ourselves at the foot of the cross on Good Friday.

It's so easy to throw rocks at the Pharisees. to judge them for their bad behaviour. To join in the chorus of voices throughout the millennia that have criticized and belittled them.
It's much harder to realize that we are they. Hence, I believe, this story's appearance during Lent.

The situation we are facing in the church right now isn't quite the same as it was just over 2000 years ago. Christians (or even Episcopalians) are not a minority religion in an occupied country. We aren't trying to shut up Jesus in order to protect ourselves. Instead, I fear that we are running the risk of trying to quiet controversy in order to protect "the church."

Take the current issue of homosexuality that is causing so much grief and angst in the Anglican Communion. Those who believe that gay and lesbian people should not be ordained, have their relationships blessed, or even be welcomed to the table want gay people to go away. They want to limit who can be in leadership in the church and who may have their relationships blessed. The truth is that there have always been gay and lesbian people in the church, but when gay and lesbian Christians stayed closeted, were ashamed and afraid, and were not honest about who they were as full people of God, the church could ignore them.

It's the same on the other side of the argument. Those of us who believe that gay and lesbian people are full people of God, whose sexual orientation is not a bar to ordination, the blessing or relationships or being fed at the table, secretly wish that folks who speak out against the full inclusion of gay and lesbian people would go away.

We would prefer to quiet the likes of Peter Akinola (the Archbishop of Nigeria, who has led the international fight against inclusion of gay and lesbian people), Martin Mynns (the former rector of Truro Parish in Virginia, who has recently been consecrated bishop in the Nigerian church and now leads the Nigerian "mission" to save the Anglican church in the US) and many Southern Cone Anglicans. Can't these people see that this is an issue of justice and inclusion? Can't they see that Jesus loved all people? We'd prefer a church focused on justice and mission, not caught up in fighting about who does and doesn't belong.

I think that it's safe to say that no matter which side of this (or any) debate we might have in the church, we don't much like controversy. We would far rather just pretend to be nice and get along. And when someone does come along who makes us uncomfortable, who makes us look at things we'd rather not see – people like Gene Robinson OR Peter Akinola, we wish they'd be quiet, go away, and stop causing trouble.

Frankly, it doesn't matter what the source of controversy is. Christians disagree about all sorts of things: the war in Iraq, the death penalty, the best way to fight poverty, the place of women in the church, the role of government, you name it. But whatever the issue, our call as Christians is not to sit quietly and hope to avoid trouble or to try to silence those who disagree with us. Our call is to speak out. Which is not easy to do. It's scary and risky.

Jesus also told the people that he longed to gather all of the people together, like a hen gathers her chicks under her wings. He doesn't long to gather the conservatives OR the gay people. He longs to gather everyone, together. And when that happens, then our divisions will cease.

Paul tells us, in his letter to the Philippians, that we are to imitate him – and to stand firm in the Lord. As we continue our journey through Lent, towards Holy Week and the cross, we are to look to Jesus, rather than the Pharisees as our example.

Jesus spoke the truth in love. With a few notable exceptions, Jesus did not rant or rave. He did not condemn people. He did not tell soldiers to stop being soldiers or prostitutes to stop being prostitutes. He ate with tax collectors and sinners. He allowed a woman of ill repute to anoint him with oil. He conversed with an woman of ill repute at the well and offered her "living water."
Jesus loved people for who and what they were. And when he did disagree with people, he generally did it with grace and gentleness. Jesus did not shy away from controversy and difficult situations. He did not worry about how others perceived him. He cared about justice and freedom and peace. And he spoke out clearly to get them.

Our call, this Lent - and every day - is to follow Jesus’ example with courage.

A Literary Meme

2007-03-05T23:14:00.000-05:00

This comes from my friend Wayfarer's blog. I suppose that I should have all 100 highlighted after 12 years in bookselling, one undergraduate degree (nearly a minor in English), and two graduate degrees. But alas, not so. I'm also realizing that I've not read much that isn't theology - and am missing most of the new fiction from the last four years. Not, a surprise.

Look at the list of books below.
* (Bold) the ones you’ve read
* Italicize the ones you want to read
* Leave unchanged the ones that you aren’t interested in.
I've added another piece there are a number of personal favourites on this list. They are in red.
* If you are reading this, tag, you’re it!

1. The Da Vinci Code (Dan Brown)
2. Pride and Prejudice (Jane Austin)
3. To Kill A Mockingbird (Harper Lee)
4. Gone With The Wind (Margaret Mitchell)
5. The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King (Tolkien)
6. The Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring (Tolkien)
7. The Lord of the Rings: Two Towers (Tolkien)
8. Anne of Green Gables (L.M. Montgomery)
9. Outlander (Diana Gabaldon)
10. A Fine Balance (Rohinton Mistry)
11. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (Rowling)
12. Angels and Demons (Dan Brown)
13. Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix (Rowling)
14. A Prayer for Owen Meany (John Irving)
15. Memoirs of a Geisha (Arthur Golden)
16. Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone (Rowling)
17. Fall on Your Knees (Ann-Marie MacDonald)
18. The Stand (Stephen King)
19. Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (Rowling)
20. Jane Eyre (Charlotte Bronte)
21. The Hobbit (Tolkien)
22. The Catcher in the Rye (J.D. Salinger)
23. Little Women (Louisa May Alcott)
24. The Lovely Bones (Alice Sebold)
25. Life of Pi (Yann Martel)
26. The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy (Douglas Adams)
27. Wuthering Heights (Emily Bronte)
28. The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe (C. S. Lewis)
29. East of Eden (John Steinbeck)
30. Tuesdays with Morrie (Mitch Albom)
31. Dune (Frank Herbert)
32. The Notebook (Nicholas Sparks)
33. Atlas Shrugged (Ayn Rand)
34. 1984 (Orwell)
35. The Mists of Avalon (Marion Zimmer Bradley)
36. The Pillars of the Earth (Ken Follett)
37. The Power of One (Bryce Courtenay)
38. I Know This Much is True (Wally Lamb)
39. The Red Tent (Anita Diamant)
40. The Alchemist (Paulo Coelho)
41. The Clan of the Cave Bear (Jean M. Auel)
42. The Kite Runner (Khaled Hosseini)
43. Confessions of a Shopaholic (Sophie Kinsella)
44. The Five People You Meet In Heaven (Mitch Albom)
45. Bible
46. Anna Karenina (Tolstoy)
47. The Count of Monte Cristo (Alexandre Dumas)
48. Angela’s Ashes (Frank McCourt)
49. The Grapes of Wrath (John Steinbeck)
50. She’s Come Undone (Wally Lamb)
51. The Poisonwood Bible (Barbara Kingsolver)
52. A Tale of Two Cities (Dickens)
53. Ender’s Game (Orson Scott Card)
54. Great Expectations (Dickens)
55. The Great Gatsby (Fitzgerald)
56. The Stone Angel (Margaret Laurence)
57. Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (Rowling)
58. The Thorn Birds (Colleen McCullough)
59. The Handmaid’s Tale (Margaret Atwood)
60. The Time Traveller’s Wife (Audrew Niffenegger)
61. Crime and Punishment (Fyodor Dostoyevsky)
62. The Fountainhead (Ayn Rand)
63. War and Peace (Tolsoy)
64. Interview With The Vampire (Anne Rice)
65. Fifth Business (Robertson Davis)
66. One Hundred Years Of Solitude (Gabriel Garcia Marquez)
67. The Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants (Ann Brashares)
68. Catch-22 (Joseph Heller)
69. Les Miserables (Hugo)
70. The Little Prince (Antoine de Saint-Exupery)
71. Bridget Jones’ Diary (Fielding)
72. Love in the Time of Cholera (Marquez)
73. Shogun (James Clavell)
74. The English Patient (Michael Ondaatje)
75. The Secret Garden (Frances Hodgson Burnett)
76. The Summer Tree (Guy Gavriel Kay)
77. A Tree Grows in Brooklyn (Betty Smith)
78. The World According To Garp (John Irving)
79. The Diviners (Margaret Laurence)
80. Charlotte’s Web (E.B. White)
81. Not Wanted On The Voyage (Timothy Findley)
82. Of Mice And Men (Steinbeck)
83. Rebecca (Daphne DuMaurier)
84. Wizard’s First Rule (Terry Goodkind)
85. Emma (Jane Austen)
86. Watership Down(Richard Adams)
87. Brave New World (Aldous Huxley)
88. The Stone Diaries (Carol Shields)
89. Blindness (Jose Saramago)
90. Kane and Abel (Jeffrey Archer)
91. In The Skin Of A Lion (Ondaatje)
92. Lord of the Flies (Golding)
93. The Good Earth (Pearl S. Buck)
94. The Secret Life of Bees (Sue Monk Kidd)
95. The Bourne Identity (Robert Ludlum)
96. The Outsiders (S.E. Hinton)
97. White Oleander (Janet Fitch)
98. A Woman of Substance (Barbara Taylor Bradford)
99. The Celestine Prophecy (James Redfield)
100. Ulysses (James Joyce)

Harry Potter Character Quiz

2007-03-05T23:00:00.000-05:00

I don't know if I am more amused by the fact that I am Albus Dumbledore, OR by the fact that I am more like Lord Voldemort than either Ron Weasley or Draco Malfoy. Hmmm. Fascinating. Thanks to Suzanne for sending me to this quiz. :)

You scored as Albus Dumbledore. You are very wise, observant, and analyctical. You have a very "well-organized" mind, which makes you function in a calm and fair manner. Though you get angered easily, its rare of you to ever act out of temper. You are constantly seeing the good in people and are naturally forgiving because of it. You're easy to please and a great person to learn from.

Albus Dumbledore

84%

Sirius Black

72%

Remus Lupin

69%

Hermione Granger

66%

Bellatrix Lestrange

63%

Oliver Wood

47%

Harry Potter

47%

Percy Weasley

44%

Lord Voldemort

44%

Ron Weasley

41%

Severus Snape

28%

Neville Longbottom

28%

Luna Lovegood

22%

Draco Malfoy

href="'http://quizfarm.com/test.php?q_id="2852'">Harry Potter Character Combatibility Test
created with QuizFarm.com

Snow Day!

2007-03-01T14:50:00.000-05:00

Even by Yooper standards, this one's getting alot of hype. For the last three days, all anybody could talk about was the weather. Blizzard. High winds. Whiteouts. 10-15" of snow. Lions and tigers and bears, oh my!

Last night, I received an email from Manuel that said, "Do not leave the house in the am until we've talked." I went to bed feeling like a ten year old. "Please, please, please let it snow," I chanted as I went to bed. And I awoke feeling that same disappointment I felt when I was ten and the much vaunted snow storm had not materialized.

I got up, made coffee and began scouring the online weather resources to sort out what was happening weather-wise and what I should do.

I called Manuel at 8:30; he said, "Good Morning. I think you should stay home today." The storm was late, but still coming. And so, I stayed home. I was back to feeling like that ten year old who has suddenly gotten a day free from school.

5I'm home on a Thursday! (It's my busiest day; I usually leave the house at 8:45 and get home around 11:30pm.) I have NO obligations. Er, no, scratch that. I have a ton of obligations and suddenly all the time I need to do them. Er, scratch that, too. I have time to noodle on the computer and have lunch with Ellie!

I'm home from lunch now, and sitting at my computer. As soon as I finish posting this entry, I'll be ready to produce a worship booklet for our diocesan Spring Conference next weekend. And ten minutes ago, the snow began to fall, in earnest. I don't know how hard the wind is blowing, but the snow is falling more at an angle than straight down.

I'm feeling grateful for a day at home with Sam!Cat, power, food and heat.

Snowy Adventures

2007-02-26T21:05:00.000-05:00

It has snowed a bunch in the last 24 hours - but I guess that just gives us a great deal in common with wide swaths of the northern part of the country.

I went to Houghton last night to help, as always, with the Explore service at Trinity. This particular service had a bit of extra preparation added to it, as Jim (our bishop) was making a visit to Trinity and staying for Explore. It was snowing and blowing by the time we were all cleaned up, and so I opted to stay the night. Popcorn and "The Constant Gardener" entertained us. It was a very smart choice; we had to get plowed out this am.

The adventure really began on the drive home. To get to the highway, there's a long way and a shortcut. The shortcut was not yet plowed. I didn't think we'd gotten that much snow, so decided to try the shortcut. I was tooling along on this seriously back road doing just fine. Then, a came to a curve, followed by a steep hill. I slowed for the curve, but then didn't have enough momentum to carry myself up the steep hill. OOPS.

So, I backed down and tried again. The upshot - I got well and truly stuck. I tried rocking, scuffing, and cursing, all to no avail. Amazingly, my cell phone had signal, so I called for roadside assistance. I was trying hard to locate myself to the dude who was clearly somewhere NOT in the UP. Atlantic Mine. Covered Drive. Just went past a road that starts with K - do you see that? "Ma'am all the roads I am looking at have numbers on them. Which number are you on?" Uh. Numbers? Dang. At the moment when I was feeling the most desperate about the whole thing, a plow arrived on the scene.

I popped out of my car and waved them down. The lovely plow dudes from the Houghton County road works, pushed me and prodded me out of the road, then plowed out where I was stuck, "backplowed" where I had gone, and then tooled off. [Backplow - the apparently technical term for driving into a narrow place and then dragging the plow while backing up - it really tamps the snow down.] I started out again, got stuck again, and then, through sheer force of will, got out of the rut, and up the hill. HOORAY.

Life lessons learned: Maggie is an awesome car, but perhaps unplowed back roads are too much for her. Carry kitty litter. I'd just told my friend Chris that Kitty Litter was an essential component to a winterized car. I got a bag on the way home.

Sermon, Lent 1

2007-02-24T00:45:00.001-05:00

I'm feeling very angry about the state of the church. I read the draft of the Covenant for the Anglican Communion and the Communique from the Primates' meeting in Tanzania. You can download them both here.

My response was to write the following sermon for Sunday, based primarily in Luke's gospel, Luke 4:1-13, where Jesus is being tempted in the desert by the devil after his baptism.

Lent 1 ~ Ontonagon, MI

In this morning's reading from Luke's gospel, Jesus is driven into the desert where he is tempted by the devil for 40 days.

How does the devil tempt Jesus? Certainly, he does so by dangling before him things that might be useful to a man who A) has been in the desert without food and water for 40 days and B) wants to bring about radical change in the world.

First, the devil suggests that Jesus turn stones into bread, then he offers him power over all the world, and finally he tells Jesus that if he throws himself off the height of the temple, God will protect him.

It's what happens in that last temptation that I want to focus on this morning. When the devil tempts Jesus to throw himself off the top of the temple, he quotes scripture to bolster his argument. Hear that again: The devil quotes scripture to tempt Jesus.

Popular culture has fed us a host of images of the devil. The devil is nearly cartoon-like, sort of a red dude with horns and a pointy tail. He's got a lear, a goatee, and an evil smile. The devil is the stuff of Halloween costumes.

It's harder and much more frightening to realize that the devil might come amongst us as one of us. Maybe the devil comes to church every Sunday. Sits in our midst. Leads our churches. Has the best intentions in the world. Or not. Either way, the devil may be harder to recognize than we think.

When the devil tempted Jesus, he used some verses from Psalm 91 to suggest that if Jesus were to throw himself from the top of the temple, God would protect him because he is the Son of God. However, a full reading of Psalm 91 shows that the devil is using this scripture passage in a VERY limited way. In Psalm 91, God assures those who find their strength in Him that God will offer protection. God promises to keep safe those who rely on God. There's nothing in Psalm 91 that says that if you act recklessly, God will keep you safe. There's nothing to suggest that in all circumstances God will keep you from harm. What gives you safety in Psalm 91 is loving God.

The devil accomplishes his tempting using a shady technique called proof-texting. He pulls a couple of verses of scripture totally out of context and then uses them to try to persuade.
It happens all the time in the church. We pull out a bit of scripture and hold it up above all others. We fail to check one line against another to see if we are getting the fullest or most accurate meaning.

Or, we fail to pay attention to things like genre. Is the text quoted an allegory? Poetry? History? What setting was the text was written for? Is it addressing a particular issue? Does it have broad application?

In the history of The Church, people have used proof-texting to justify all sorts of bad behaviour - slavery, the ill treatment of women, discrimination against gay and lesbian people, odd dietary choices, war in the Middle East, really the list goes on.

In terms of full disclosure, I have to confess to you that, in case you hadn't noticed, I'm feeling a bit fired up about scriptural interpretation this week. I've been affected by the primate's meeting in Tanzania last week and recent events in our church and communion. I'm watching certain segments of the church level accusations, rework Anglican polity, or leave their dioceses all because of what clearly seems to be bad scriptural interpretation. It's breaking my heart.

It's nearly impossible for me to think of Archbishop Peter Akinola, or Bishop Robert Duncan, and not think that we're back in the desert with Jesus and the devil is quoting scripture to tempt us. In this case, the devil is quoting scripture in our churches.

The men (and some women, as well) who would ask the Episcopal church to limit who is fully welcome in the church, to limit who has access to holy orders, and to decide whose relationships can be blessed by the church are doing just what the devil did when he tempted Jesus. They are looking at small parts of scripture in isolation and then using them to tempt us to behave wrongly.

These devils pull a few verses out of Leviticus or from the letters of Paul. They hold these verses up to bolster their tempting. And because it is scripture and because they speak with authority, many many in the church listen to them.
What is required here, is that we be discerning listeners. We must weigh what we hear using a broad variety of tools. A host of options are available to us. There's the Anglican stool where we use four "legs" to examine things - Scripture, Tradition, History and Reason. Responsible scriptural interpretation also requires us to look at the context of a particular passage. For example: Why was the book of Leviticus written? What situations were being addressed by its authors? Do we give equal weight to all parts of the book? How about the passage in Romans? Is there any connection between what Paul was addressing in that book and the situations we find today?

And finally, here's the really bad news. We are as likely to be the devils as those who disagree with us. Honestly, I am as capable of wrongly interpreting as anyone else. All that we can do is try to be faithful.

The Trappist Monk, Thomas Merton, wrote a wonderful prayer that can help to guide us as we look carefully at questions of faith and interpretation. He said:

MY LORD GOD, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think that I am following your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe that the desire to please you does in fact please you. And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing. I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire. And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road though I may know nothing about it. Therefore will I trust you always though I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death. I will not fear, for you are ever with me, and you will never leave me to face my perils alone. AMEN

Sermon for 6 Epiphany

2007-02-11T08:33:00.000-05:00

Epiphany 6 11 February 2007 Ironwood, MI

I can’t really beat around the bush here. Today’s readings are HARD. They contain a difficult message for those of us living in the developed world.

It would be easy for us to read Luke’s version of the beatitudes and simply throw our hands up in the air. After all, Luke tells us that the world is divided into those who are blessed and those who are cursed. The blessed are those who are poor, hungry, weeping, and reviled. And the cursed..... Well, the truth is, they look a lot like us.

I think that it’s a safe bet to say that among those of us here in church this morning, the vast majority of us are rich (at least when we look at things on a global scale), well-fed, happy, and well-respected. It doesn’t look so good for us. Woe to us.

Now, I don’t want to let us off the hook too easily. But, I do want to take a step back from the harshness.

First of all, we must look at this passage in the context of Luke’s whole gospel. Remember that Luke is the gospel writer who writes with the perspective of the underdog always at the forefront. Luke’s community may well have been experiencing persecution. Certainly a number of early Christian communities did.

Luke begins to put forth his vision of overturning oppressive systems as early as the first chapter of his gospel. When Mary bursts forth in her famous hymn of praise, the Magnificat, she says, “He has brought down the powerful from their thrones, and lifted up the lowly; he has filled the hungry with good things, and sent the rich away empty.”

Just a few weeks back, we heard Luke’s story of Jesus’ return to his own home town of Nazareth to inaugurate his ministry. In his local synagogue, he preached: The Spirit of the Lord is upon me because he has anointed me to bring good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim release to the captives and recovery of sight to the blind, to let the oppressed go free, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.

It’s also helpful to think about these HARD words in the context of the history of church teaching and doctrine. The church has had a history of interpreting scripture and teaching in terms of what the church calls eschatology. That’s a hefty theological word that simply means the end times.

It has been the traditional practice to read this section of Luke “eschatologically.” In other words, seeing the contents of this passage as referring to the future. If you’re life is hard now, you’ll be rewarded in heaven. And if you’re life is full now, then you better watch out later. Woe to you.

But, in reality, eschatologically reading the texts takes some pressure off of everybody. It serves to keep the poor down - because it’s actually better to be poor in this system. And, it absolves those of us who are rich of any responsibility. We’re sort of hopelessly stuck in the cursed column. There’s no need for social change, because the reward for misery now is eternal blessing.

What would happen if we stopped reading these texts with an eschatological eye, and instead began to read them in the here and now. What if the coming of God’s kingdom were not off in the future, but available to us here in the present? What if the hungry were fed NOW? And the poor had enough NOW? What if those whose lives were filled with mourning could find joy NOW? And those who were persecuted found their persecution ending NOW?

I don’t know about you, but I’d rather live in that world than the one we are presently living in.

Desmond Tutu says that when we read texts about justice eschatologically, we are essentially offering hungry people pie-in-the-sky for later. He reminds us that nobody wants post-mortem pies and that hungry people need to be fed now.

Furthermore, if we truly believe that the God we worship is a God of Love, those of us who are fed, prosperous, happy, and well-respected will not automatically be cursed for an accident of our birth.

However, we must face what the words here say. If we are going to stop reading the blessings eschatologically, we must stop reading the curses eschatologically, as well. We risk landing in the woe column based on what we do with what we have in the here and now.

Here are some ways to think about this.

In the passage we hear this morning from Jeremiah, he also talks about blessings and curses - those who put their trust in mortals and flesh and turn away from the LORD will find their lives barren and arid. A contemporary reading might be that those of us who trust in our wealth, our power, our independence, our self-sufficiency will find our lives barren and arid. Woe to us, if we fail to trust in God.

Or, perhaps the source of our woe will be the ways in which we cling to what we have. Every study I’ve read about wealth and poverty says that we have enough resources in the world at present to eliminate poverty and hunger. The problem is not resources but distribution.

Now, I know that none of us here this morning is wealthy in a Rupert Murdoch or Bill & Melinda Gates kind of way. However, we are all wealthier than we think.

There’s a great website - www.globalrichlist.com - where you can plug in your annual salary and find out where you sit in the ranking of the world’s wealth. My yearly salary puts me in the top 11% of the world’s richest people. Or, thought about another way, 89% of the world lives on less than $20,000 a year. Do I share my prosperity, or do I horde what I have? Woe to us, if we fail to share.

Finally, I think about attitude. I’ve talked with you before about some of my African friends. These are people who live daily with poverty, have experienced hunger and deprivation, loss, and criticism for their faith. And yet, despite this, they never stop talking about how God has blessed them. On the other hand, here in the US, we live in a culture that says that we are all just one purchase away from happiness. We look for bigger and better bargains, bigger and better toys of every kind. And, as I look around me, and encounter people, I see a great deal of unhappiness. For many of us, whatever we have, it’s never enough. We are eternally unsatisfied. Woe to us.

The choice, my friends, is ours. Blessing and Woe are not states cast upon us by God. They are not eschatological promises. They are possibilities, to be sure, over which we, who are currently blessed, have some control.

Hear the words of another great prophet, Moses, in the book of Deuteronomy.

I call heaven and earth to witness against you today that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Choose life so that you and your descendants may live, loving the LORD your God, obeying God, and holding fast to God; for that means life to you and length of days. AMEN

How Rich are you?

2007-02-11T08:26:00.000-05:00

In today's sermon, I talk about global poverty (now, there's a shock!). I referenced the site globalrichlist.com. There, I found that I am in the top 11% of the world's wealthiest people. Here's how you can find out where you rank.

I'm the 669,642,941 richest person on earth!

Discover how rich you are! >>

Brrr ... Cold and Snowy

2007-02-05T12:50:00.000-05:00

Well, we've finally started getting the winter I have to be able to live with if I'm going to stay a while in the UP. For the last couple of days, it's been bitterly cold with a scary windchill factor. It's also been snowing to beat the band. I knew that somehow I'd settled in when I went outside this morning, thought it felt quite warm, and discovered on my car's thermometer that it was 1. That's 1 degree Farenheit, my friends!

I've discovered that when it is this cold the snow does a weird thing on the road. It doesn't settle in for the long haul and it doesn't dissipate. Instead, it hangs about and when cars drive on it, it rises up in clouds that are perfectly capable of totally obscuring one's vision. Translation: one can be driving along the road, meet a car, and be suddenly, totally, and completely blinded. Several times in the last few days, I've had to come to a complete stop in the road and wait for the clouds of snow to settle, because I could see nothing. Nada. Zip. Just another UP driving adventure.

Despite the cold and the clouds o' snow, it's absolutely gorgeous. It looks like a fairy land. The trees appear to be frosted with spun sugar. The falling snow looks like diamond crystals. The snow is light and shovels pretty easily. The beauty makes the discomfort worth it.

The North Shore?

2007-01-23T23:17:00.000-05:00

I'm still adjusting to life in the Midwest. Growing up in Massachusetts, the North Shore meant the part of Massachusetts that was on the ocean, north of Boston. Up here, it means the North Shore of Lake Superior. If you want a sense of the geography click here. I live on the south part, at the base of the peninsula that contains Houghton/Hancock and Copper Harbor. (I'm just above that little cluster of mountains.) If you drove on highways all around Lake Superior, it would be over 1000 miles.

My friends Letha & Scott and I just spent 40 glorious hours on the North Shore (9 miles north of Grand Marais) in a house belonging to friends of theirs. It was glorious. The sun was shining. It was cold (but not as cold as it could have been, given that it is winter and we were in Minnesota). We played tons of games (Scrabble, Five Crowns, cards) and ate great food. We drank way more than our share of red wine. I proved (against some odds) to be the Fire Queen, getting some good fires going in the big stone fireplace. Letha and I took a great hike on the Superior Hiking Trail.

Wildlife abounded. We saw cardinals, blue jays, gulls, nuthatches, chickadees, and eagles. A bald eagle flew in from over the water yesterday and spent about 20 minutes in a tree across the street until it headed off to fish. Today, it (or another?) came back while I was in the shower. Several small red squirrels that chided us whenever we left the house and disturbed their meals at the feeders.

We walked on the beach yesterday and today. The north shore's beach is really rocky. The lake has not frozen this year, and some interesting things were happening on the beach. The rocks froze in clusters. We saw these amazing ledges made from ice, gravel, and larger rocks. As the sun melted the ice today, they were collapsing. As we stood there, we could hear the rocks dropping four to six inches.

There was also a deer carcass on the beach, which had fed a host of carnivores. Our best guess is that it was hit on the road nearby, wandered onto the beach, and died there.

In the house, we had no cell phone coverage, no internet, no television. I feel rested and recharged. Total miles driven for this adventure: 589.

Two more eagles

2007-01-19T22:00:00.000-05:00

Or, maybe it was the same eagle twice.

Manuel and I drove to Ironwood together yesterday. On the ride over, we saw a murder of crows feasting on a dead deer by the side of the road. With them was a bald eagle, also feasting. Because bald eagles have been so much a part of my time here, I was very excited.

Manuel said that he'd seen so many of them that he didn't even get excited anymore. I hope that doesn't happen to me. When I see a bald eagle, my heart quickens. I give a little gasp. And I grin like a fool from ear to ear.

On the way home, we saw the same murder of crows feasting; an eagle (perhaps the same one) was feasting, as well. I don't care if it was the same eagle. My heart beat quickened. I gasped and grinned. And I counted it again.

Running UP eagle count: 7

Do you think it's about Baptismal Ministry?

2007-01-16T23:24:00.000-05:00

Since I moved into this house in July, I've had at least ten plumbing issues. First, it was the sewage pipes which had been entirely destroyed by tree roots. One memorable Sunday night, I realized that the basement floor was covered with (ick) raw sewage. For several days, I was without water, as they sorted out the problem and then replaced the entire sewer pipe system from house to road. I first suspected a problem when the basement floor was covered in water whenever I did laundry. Laundry runoff water was leaking back into the basement from a crack in the foundation. That's so bad.

Since then, they've replaced the heating elements in the hot water heater because the hot water would conk out mid-shower. And fixed a leak in the basement that was actually coming from the bathroom (water leaking from the toilet tank). And done some more rotorooter - when the laundry run off started coming in again. And fixed a leak from the washer itself.

Last night, while I was doing dinner clean up, the garbage disposal finally went south. And both sinks in the kitchen refused to drain. And the disposal began to leak really fast. Picture me with buckets running between tub and under sink. Bailing the sinks frantically. The good news: Ron the plumber came today, put in new disposal (thank God!) and replaced pipes all over the place. The kitchen sink drains. Hooray.

At the end of each plumbing event, I've thought to myself. "OK. The house sat empty for 19 years. You expect some maintainance to have built up. But, we're done now."

So tonight, when I went down to do laundry, I lost it when there was, again, water all over the basement floor. I said many many many bad words. I yelled. I screamed. I cleared everything away from the puddle, and gave thanks that my tent was dry. I played with the valve that seemed to be leaking - only to cause more water to spray out. So, I called Chuck. Again. And he came over. Again. Happily, it was a simple bolt-tightening thing.

After he left, I decided that maybe this is God's sense of humour. What we do here is Baptismal ministry. We all have ministry by virtue of our baptism. Perhaps there's so much water in my basement because God wants to make sure that I get the baptism metaphor. She does have a sense of humor.

Virginia, Florida, Virginia, Home

2007-01-13T20:58:00.000-05:00

This has been a week on the road, but in a more far-flung way than usual. Last Saturday, I departed Ontonagon before sunrise (which was really about 7:50am, but we don't want to talk about that, do we?). Because I live in the UP and flights in and out are limited, I did a little creative traveling. My ultimate destination was DelRay Beach, Florida. The training I was attending ran from early Monday am until 3pm on Weds. We were asked to book flights that left after 5 on Weds, so that we did not leave the training early. Turns out, you can't leave DelRay Beach after 5 and get home to the UP on the same day. So, I got creative and booked one round trip from Marquette to DCA (National Airport) and then one from DCA to Palm Beach.

I spent Saturday in Washington/Northern Virginia, visiting with friends and enjoying the Fawcett's hospitality; Sunday, I worshipped at St. Anne's and generally reveled in being back with so many folks that I love. Dinner with Kate before flying out completed the day.

After a two hour delay on Sunday night, I flew to Florida where I was trained to be an anti-racism trainer for the Episcopal Church. The weather was warm and sunny, but the training was long and tiring, so I didn't get to enjoy Florida nearly as much as I might have if I had been there for something less taxing. I still managed a long brisk walk on Monday night and an evening sitting outside and visiting with other trainees on Tuesday. This was not, however, a day at the beach!

I must say, there's nothing like several days of listening to people talk about the kinds of cruelty they have experienced because of race (and class, and gender, and sexual orientation) to make me want to cry. Or get violent. Or (at least on good days) actively work to change the world.

I returned to VA on Weds night, had more time with friends, flying out at noon on Friday. Thursday morning, Kate and I took a walk in the sun, watching birds and admiring creation at Huntley Meadows. The beauty of that place and the gift of our conversation did much to recharge my soul.

I survived an amazing airport adventure in Minneapolis. [We won't even talk about the fact that I thought I was going to Detroit, since nearly every flight from DCA to MQT goes through Detroit, and it was only when I got to the airport and the Northwest agent said, "Gardner, going to Minneapolis," when she handed me my luggage tag that I learned otherwise!] I landed in Minneapolis at 1:45CT for a 3:35CT flight to MQT. The monitor said that the flight was delayed until 4:30. I got some sushi, poked in a bookstore, fought with the airport wifi, and finally, about 2:55, I wandered off to the gate. The plane was now listing at 5:05. I called the friend who agreed to meet me at the airport, and alerted her to the great lateness of the flight. Settled at my gate, fought with the wifi somemore, and then heard someone talking about a flight that was not going to Marquette. So, I wandered off, at 3:28 to check the status of my flight and see if it had moved gates. The flight had moved to a new gate, and reverted to being on time. I raced back, scooped up my stuff, sprinted to the new gate, and discovered that the plane was actually boarding. Great aerobic exercise. I bought the older Barak Obama book to read in the airport, since my first book would not stand the test of the extra hours, and then I slept most of the way from MSP to MQT. Sigh.

I'm in MQT, at the apartment, but it's closer to home then I've been in a week, and it feels great.

What kind of reader are you?

2007-01-13T20:50:00.000-05:00

This quiz comes from my friend Lisa the Librarian. Several of you may remember Lisa, from when she was Lisa the Library School Student - and crashed on my dorm floor in Alexandria periodically during my first year. Those of you who know me well won't be surprised by the quiz results. Where do you fall?

What Kind of Reader Are You? Your Result: Dedicated Reader You are always trying to find the time to get back to your book. You are convinced that the world would be a much better place if only everyone read more.
Obsessive-Compulsive Bookworm
Literate Good Citizen
Book Snob
Fad Reader
Non-Reader
What Kind of Reader Are You? Create Your Own Quiz

Sam - Samwell - Samaroonie - Sammy - Samuel - Monster Cat

2007-01-05T22:57:00.000-05:00

I don't want to turn this into a blog about how my cat is the king of the freaking universe, or even just one more cat blog. But, he is pretty cute. And he is turning into Sam the Wonder Cat of Many Names.

He has a number of endearing qualities that I simply must share (especially as I am about to abandon him for a week while I'm in FL and VA. Cheers to Jeannie who will feed, water, toss catnip mice, and scoop while I'm gone!):

That boy can eviscerate a catnip mouse in about ten minutes. He's pretty good with the dangly feather toy, too.
When I am at the table and not sitting flat against the back of my chair, he leaps onto my back (but with no claws out) then crawls up onto my shoulder. He does that when I am playing cards, too.
He's cute. Have I mentioned that?
His favourite place to snuggle is with back paws on my lap, front paws on my sternum, and head nuzzling mine. It's pretty fab. Since my first cat induced me to take her home from the shelter by placing one front paw on each shoulder and tucking her head under my chin and then never did it again I'm pretty thrilled that this behaviour hasn't vanished.
He loves toys and plays with all of them, chasing mice and rubber balls with abandon.
He comes when I call him.
He sleeps at the foot of my bed.
My desk is a honkingly big old metal desk with a typing tray that juts out at a ninety degree angle. I leave it open so that I have one more surface to clutter. Except that now it's HIS space. He sleeps there when I'm working at the desk. He's there now, purring away.

On the other hand, lest you think he is only angelic:

He sometimes tries to sleep on the paperwork, on the laptop, on the cluttered desk. It's hard to type with a cat lying on the keys.
If his food bowl is empty, he wakes me up at 6am.
I've caught him sharpening his claws on the chair that belongs to the parish. I wouldn't like it any better if he sharpened his claws on MY chair, but at least it would be MY chair. Y'kno?
He can be an insistent pain in the ass if he wants to be cuddled and I am, say, writing a sermon... or a blog entry.
He has, on several occasions bitten when annoyed. Mostly it was my mother, though.

New Year's Eve Sermon

2007-01-01T11:05:00.000-05:00

I thought the sermon I preached on New Year's Eve was pretty good, so I thought I'd share it here. I preached it from the pulpit at Church of the Ascension in Ontonagon at the 10am service, and then preached it agin, largely from memory (though holding my notes in my lap!) at Explore on Sunday night.

Also, I read Sarey's sermon posted on her LJ, and thought it was even better - wish I'd written it. Here is the link to her sermon: Dragons, Dracula, and Darth Vader.

Text for the Day: John 1:1-18
We are in the midst of the twelve days of Christmas, so the folks who fashioned the lectionary that we use to determine our weekly readings chose to focus on stories of Jesus’ origins. On Christmas Eve, we heard Luke’s version of the story of Jesus’ nativity, replete with angels and shepherds, and, of course, a baby in a manger. John’s version of this same story is much more cosmic. Jesus is the logos, the word and wisdom of God, who has been with God since “The Beginning.”

For John, that’s the same beginning that we hear about in Genesis… In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. And it was the logos, the sophia, that gave voice to God’s creating power. That word mediated the creative power of God, created with God, and continues to be a source of life and light, a beacon of hope in and for the world.

That Logos, John tells us, eventually took on flesh and came to dwell among us. In the biblical Greek, the word for flesh is sarx; it’s an earthy word. This is not some ethereal body we’re talking about here, this is physical flesh and blood. And the biblical Greek word skayno, here translated as dwell, can also be translated as tent among. The first century Jews, upon hearing this, would remember that the tabernacle of the covenant traveled with the Israelites in a tent during their time in the desert.

In the Episcopal church, we have an Incarnational-God-With-Us-Emmanuel theology, and it takes its roots right here in the poetic language of John.

John also tells us that the logos is the light for the people, shining in the darkness.

Right at the moment, when I look at the world we live in, I feel like we could use a little light. There’s civil war in Sudan and Somalia. Deadly natural disasters in Southeast Asia and Texas. Corruption in the ongoing Katrina recovery efforts. Saddam Hussein executed for his vicious crimes against humanity; the news of his execution greeted with celebration and dancing in the streets. Church fights about biblical interpretation, orthodoxy, and who belongs. It’s grim.

But grimness is not, in fact, all that there is. There is light in the world, if we have eyes to see it. John tells us that there were those who did not recognize the light, the logos.

During the time that I managed the bookstore, a book came out called Pay it Forward. It was one of those lovely mind-candy books that doesn’t have a ton of substance, but spent time on the bestseller lists. It was a feel-good book that left me in tears at the end – my favourite kind of reading experience, really. And then it got made into a movie.

The basic plot is that a social studies teacher assigns his middle school class a project: to do something to change the world, for extra credit. One twelve year old boy in the class comes up with the idea of Paying Forward. The idea is that if someone does you a favour, you don’t pay them back, you pay the favour forward. And you don’t pay it forward once, you pay it forward three times. It doesn’t have to be a huge thing, it just has to be an unexpected kindness. Helping someone else who is in need. And, you don’t do it just once. For each kindness done for you, you pay forward three times. So that one person does a nice thing for three people, who each do a nice thing for three people, so that nine people then pay forward to twenty-seven…. You get the idea.

John tells us that the logos came to shed light on places of darkness and that the darkness could not overcome the light. This true light, John tells us, will enlighten everyone. I particularly like the translation that comes from the Jesus’ seminar’s book calledThe Five Gospels: “Genuine light – the kind that provides light for everyone - was coming into the world.”

Darkness is not a bad thing; I love darkness. In fact, one of the things I grew weary of when I lived in Northern Virginia was that it’s never truly dark. I love being on the beach in Ontonagon, late at night, when the only light comes from the stars, and it’s really truly dark. But sometimes, you need to see. A tree fell on power lines near my house several months ago, and for several hours it was really really dark. I lit a candle and the effect was immediate. Darkness dispelled.

I heard about a story on NPR this week about a girl named Hallie Geier. Hallie was almost twelve when she was struck and killed by an SUV near her house. Shortly after her death, her parents found her journal, in which she’d written, “People – be nice to each other. Love, Hallie.”

Her family discovered that she had saved nearly $400 from her daily lunch money to help children with HIV/AIDS in Africa. Her parents created a foundation called Love Hallie to continue the work their daughter had been passionate about. They learned of the Agape Orphanage in South Africa where all the children were AIDS orphans. Some of them recorded a CD to raise funds to improve their facility, but before the work could be done, the orphanage burned to the ground in an electrical fire.

Love, Hallie brought ten of these children to New York, where they performed in concerts, and made connections in the music industry. They have raised enough money to rebuild their orphanage. In the spirit of the Love Hallie foundation, these AIDS orphans in South Africa donated 10% of their raised funds to help with ongoing reconstruction after Hurricane Katrina. One girl’s generosity created a circle of caring and compassion that brought light and life to a variety of places in the world.

During Advent, some of the women from St. John’s Church in Iron River made preemie hats. On the first Sunday of Advent, I talked about the MDGs in my sermon there, and encouraged people to support the goals. I talked about financial support, and then I talked about other ways to support the goals. As one example of a non-monetary project, I showed them the wee baby hat I was knitting to send to Save the Children to help combat infant mortality in developing countries. At coffee hour, several women asked for hat patterns. We all knitted – in meetings, watching movies, in the car, whenever we could. And yesterday, I mailed off a box of sixty-seven hats to Save the Children. Sixty-seven babies in Bangladesh and Malawi now have an increased chance at life. Sixty-seven little lights shining in the darkness.

The logos is the light shining in the world. But so are we. In Matthew’s gospel, Jesus tells those who would follow him: YOU are the light of the world. And he gave lots of examples of how to be that light. Love God. Love Neighbor. Feed. Clothe. Visit. Care. Have a party and don’t invite those who can return the favour, invite those who cannot.

The amazing thing about our Incarnational Theology is that Jesus’ coming into the world empowers each of us to become partners with the logos in light-bearing. We are the light of the world. We can bring light by paying forward kindnesses received, feeding those who are hungry, sharing what we have, telling the story of the Good News of the logos.

You are the light of the world. Go shine.

Taking Mama on the Road

2006-12-30T19:58:00.000-05:00

My mom's been here visiting since the 19th of December. Hooray! As she said, we've seen one another a fair amount in the last year, but it's always been around events, so this visit has been good. Lots of free time. I've had work to do, of course, but she's been reading, and doing puzzles, and we've played alot of games.

I've wanted her to meet some of my friends and colleagues, and I've wanted her to have a sense of the scope of what I do and where I go, so on Thursday we took a road trip.

We drove to Marquette in search of a pea coat for her (don't even get me started, that was a challenge, but we found a coat that she adores in store number seven!) and to do some visiting.

Thursday night, we had dinner with my friend Gwen, her husband Jim, and Jim's brother Larry, who is 60, has Down's Syndrome, and some dementia. Larry has lived with Gwen and Jim for the last eighteen years. For dinner, we ate lamb raised on a local farm and slaughtered here in the UP. Yummm.

Also, Thursday was, for those who are liturgically minded, the Feast of the Holy Innocents. Gwen and Jim are local priests in the Church of the Holy Innocents in Little Lake; they invited us to their Feast Day Eucharist. It was a beautiful service, in a lovely little church in the middle of the woods. Seven of us worshipped with the mixture of joy and solemnity that befits this particular feast day. In place of a homily, Jim read us some Christina Rosetti poetry on the Feast of the Holy Innocents. You can find the two of them here.

Friday, we had coffee with Jim (my bishop) and a few colleagues at the office, lunch with my friend Marion, finally found the aforementioned coat, and then traveled, in light to moderate snow, to Iron Mountain. My friend and colleague Charlie is the rector of Holy Trinity in Iron Mountain, missioner to the church in Menominee, and all-around fab guy. Holy Trinity has Ministry Support Teams, in addition to a rector, and Charlie's wife Linda is one of the local priests. Dinner was a fabulous pork loin, roasted, and served with homemade cranberry chutney - to die for. It was a great evening.

We tooled on home through more snow, having logged about 300 miles in just about thirty hours.

Sam

2006-12-24T00:09:00.000-05:00

My colleague Anita offered me one of her cats. It's a long story, but Sam is mine for as long as I live in the UP. He's an adult male (what I'd been longing for) and a total lovebug. However, his arrival is quite the story.

Anita lives in Marquette. I live in Ontonagon. It's about 115 miles from her house to mine. On a good day, it takes me about two hours and ten minutes to go from A to B. Last night I got snowed in in Marquette, and didn't leave for home until this am. I picked up Sam the Purring Machine at about 10:15, and he immediately began yowling.

When I called Marlene from the road, she asked, "Are you torturing small children in your car?" When Ginny called me a bit later, her first words were, "You have a very unhappy cat." It was a LONG two hours. Sam stopped yowling during Car Talk, but really that was it.

When we got home, I unloaded his cat box and his food, and then let him into the house. I showed him both, and he immediately went into the basement and hid. For hours. Just as I began to wonder if he'd ever surface, I went down stairs again, and he acted glad to see me. Against his better judgement, I brought him upstairs, where he has been prowling around, cuddling Mama and me, eviscerating a catnip mouse, and generally acting glad to be here. Presently he's contemplating, make that in, my lap.

Pictures soon.

Royalty - Who Knew?

2006-12-21T17:51:00.000-05:00

My friend Sarey turned me on to this - I've always had a bit of a royal hankering... So, I thought I'd check it out, and was totally tickled. Go ahead and try it - in these dark days, we all ought to play more!

My Peculiar Aristocratic Title is:
Lady Madame Frannie the Educated of Lardle St Earache
Get your Peculiar Aristocratic Title

O Christmas Tree

2006-12-21T00:51:00.000-05:00

Call me old fashioned but I'm kind of a stickler about Advent. Perhaps my feelings come in response to twelve years in retail management. Whatever the reason, I like Advent to be Advent and Christmas to be Christmas. I don't listen to carols until they become impossible to avoid. I like to get a tree as late as possible; I keep it up through Epiphany.

You'd think in a place as populated with trees as the UP, that a Christmas tree would not be so hard to find. Mom (aka Barbara) arrived yesterday, and I told her that I'd have a tree when she got here, so that we could decorate it together. I'm not picky. I really wanted a little tree, not necessarily dense, but approximating symmetrical. Most of its needles still in situ would be good, too. Could I find a tree that came even close to that description? NO. All the trees I saw were either ugly and pathetic or enormous, or in one sad case, both.

In fact, I started to panic. I'm working most of the next two days, what if I never found a tree? I really wanted a tree. Here. In my own living room.

Tonight, I had a meeting in Ishpeming - roughly 100 miles away. I remembered seeing some trees and a trailer in the IGA parking lot in Ishpeming, so I left early, determined to come home with a tree. Well, most of the trees were monsters - six or seven feet tall, big burly trees. Just as I was about to despair, I rounded a corner and there she was. MY TREE. She's a wee tiny thing - shorter than I am by a number of inches. My guess is that she's about 4'10" tall. She's kind of round, but not in an unseemly way. And, she fit in the back of Maggie, so that she did not have to drive home on the roof. She's shed some needles in the back of the car, so I'm not sure how healthy she is - but she's mine.

I've rearranged the furniture in the living room, so that she sits right in front of the big picture window. She's in her stand, and I hope she's sucking down water like there's no tomorrow.

She won't get lights or decorations for a day or two, but she's mine - all mine. And, one night this week, after all her lights are on, I'll keep her lit all night, and I'll sleep on the couch to keep her company. It's tradition.

Ishpeming District Court

2006-12-18T21:10:00.000-05:00

In Michigan, there is something called VBS - Violation of the Basic Speed Law. It means that if you lose control of your car in bad conditions, you're ticketable, since the Basic Speed Law says that your speed must be such that you maintain control of your car at all times. The day I rolled Maggie, the Trooper cited me for VBS - and then apologized. When he drove me to the church in Ishpeming, he said, "There's where the court is. If you contest the ticket, you'll go there."

Now, when one enters the Franklin County Court House in Greenfield, MA, one enters a building that LOOKS like a courthouse. After passing through a metal detector and getting patted down by an armed guard, one waits in a crowded hallway filled with offenders, lawyers, a judge or two, some probation officers, annoyed state troopers and police officers, and all the other hapless drivers hoping to get their day in court. It's the only courthouse I'd ever been in (before today) and is sort of my court paradigm.

Even though the trooper had pointed it out, I missed the Ishpeming District Court the first time. It's in a big, white, brick building that looks like it started life as a factory, was converted into a mall; it is now largely vacant. On the ground floor, the shops and offices were mostly empty, the one that was open sold bows (and presumably arrows, as well). I have to say, it seemed an odd business to share a building with a court.

The court area took up most of the second floor. When I arrived, the hallway was completely empty and the doors were closed. After sorting out where to check in, I entered an office. Only one other person was waiting. When I returned to the hallway, the trooper who'd been at the scene was sitting in the hallway. "Hey!" he said, with a big smile, and then motioned for me to come sit by him. "How are you?" "Did they get your car fixed?" "Were you late for church that day?" We were chatting like old friends when the magistrate called us in to court.

After being sworn in, the magistrate asked the tropper for his side of the story, and he explained that he thought that I had been driving slowly, that the road conditions were uneven, that the curve was unusually sharp, that I'd learned a valuable lesson about driving in the UP, and that I was a nice woman. I explained that I'd overestimated how fast I'd been driving when the trooper asked me (since I was watching the road and not my speedometer), that the curve was not marked, and that I was going slowly and carefully.

In the end, I was found not responsible for the accident and the ticket was dismissed! The trooper and I walked out together. I thanked him for coming in on his own time, for supporting my cause, and for his help on the day of the accident. He told me to drive carefully. We grinned at one another and walked out of the courthouse.

The accident was bad. But from the moment I lost control on, it's been nothing but grace-filled. Today was a fitting closure.

Explore! Part 1

2006-12-12T11:45:00.000-05:00

On Sunday nights, when work commitments don't keep me from it, I come home from my travels on the UP road, change into my blue jeans and a sweater, and drive to Houghton. It's 51 miles from my door to Trinity Episcopal Church, where my friend Ginny is the rector.

At 7pm on Sunday nights, Trinity offers the Explore! service. It's a quiet, contemplative eucharist. We sing Taize chants and quiet hymns. We hear the Gospel reading, often in contemporary translation, and then we reflect on it. We pray. We share the peace. Moving into the sanctuay, we gather around the most beautiful altar I've ever seen. Made by a woman named Neely out of weathered wood from an old goat barn, this altar has character and life. Gathered around the altar, we hear the story of Jesus' life and death; we share the bread and wine. During the final hymn, several of us bring out coffee, juice, and home-made cinnamon rolls; we share more communion right there in the sanctuary from the barn-wood altar.

I try hard NOT to have other commitments on Sunday nights, because this time is life-giving for me. I arrive early; in the peace of this big beautiful church, I set out the pottery chalice and paten, the home made bread, the churchy port wine. Ginny and I move the altar into position and set the shim in place that keeps it from being tippy (Neely built it outside and discovered the ground was NOT level). I sing along as Deb (the pianist) and Rick (the singer) practice the music. Sometimes I help make service leaflets, or unlock the doors. All of that preparation grounds me; when I take my place in the front pew on the right hand side, and the service begins, all of the clutter of my day, my week, my life, falls away, and I am present. And praying. And thankful.

Farewell Mark and Sharon

2006-12-06T17:08:00.000-05:00

Mark Engle has been the Rector at St. Paul's in Marquette for nearly twenty years. He retires on 31 December 2006, and he and his wife Sharon will move to Lower Michigan for proximity to grandbabies. To celebrate Mark and Sharon's time and to send them off with fond farewells, the rectors, missioners, and other assorted fans of Mark and Sharon gathered for a party on Sunday afternoon.

In other dioceses, farewells are offered at stuffy dinners, with champagne toasts. Perhaps a roasting is offered, or speeches.

In Northern Michigan, we went bowling, and then ate at Red Lobster.

Picture, if you will, twenty of us, on four lanes at the bowling alley in Marquette. Some (like Jim and me) were quite competitive (not GOOD, mind you, just competitive). Others (like Sue and Sharon) used the ramps provided for kids learning how to bowl. Some (like Chuck and Mark) were actually pretty fabulous. Anytime someone threw a strike, or a spare, or just generally made a good effort - the whole crowd, all twenty of us, cheered, screamed, and made a big fuss. I spent time wondering what the gaggle of young women bowling next to us was thinking about who we were and what we were up to. It was really fun. The result: My score - an acceptable, though not stunning, 93 - wisely 5 points below Jim's 98!

After bowling, we all trouped over to Red Lobster. No private room for this crowd. We assembled ourselves at a table for twenty in the middle of the dining room, and proceeded to eat our way through an impressive quantity of food. We chit-chatted, told stories, and then sent Mark and Sharon off to Battle Creek with presents, and they left us with gifts, as well. Speeches were made and tears were shed. My sense is that it was just the kind of send off that Mark and Sharon wanted - fun, quirky, sincere.

Via con Dios, friends.

Eats flies

2006-11-24T19:29:00.000-05:00

I'm in Minneapolis for Thanksgiving. I've been the guest of my good seminary friend Letha and her husband Scott. Joining us for the weekend are Samuel Sudhe and Nicholas Sichangi: Virginia Theological Seminary students who are Anglican priests in Kenya. It's been amazing to share food traditions, family stories, and the vast differences in how theological students are trained in Kenya compared to how we are trained here.

So, what does this have to do with eating flies? Well, there's a wonderfu ad campaign being waged in the Twin Cities. My guess is that it's encouraging freedom of thought and self-confidence. Each poster is a photo of a famous entity and something short and pithy about his/her life.

My favourite poster, seen on a bus stop shelter in St. Paul, Minnesota:

Eats flies. Dates a pig. Is a movie star. Live your Dreams - accompanied by a picture of Kermit the Frog.

Diocesan Apartment - Friday Night 11-17

2006-11-18T00:34:00.000-05:00

Diocesan Council goal-setting happened tonight and continues tomorrow. I made me reservation early for one of the beds in the diocesan apartment - it's my home away from home here in Marquette. I'd heard that Joyce and Linda, two ECW women would be staying here, as well. I'd sort of hoped some other option might come up (say, Ginny would come to goal-setting and we could go to her house), but no.

I came upstairs a bit after goal setting, feeling tired from a day of meetings (some of them quite intense) and discovered four women, spread out over the conference table. They were surrounded by bags, fabric, projects, stash. And sewing machines.

"Do you sew?" one of them asked me.

"Uh. No. But I knit," I replied.

"And you've got it with you, I saw you knitting in the meeting, pull up a chair." This wasn't really what Lucia would call a polite request. Soon, I had a chair, my knitting, and a glass of red wine in my hand, while these women worked on beautiful fabric creations that made me want to sew.

We talked of life in the UP, my ordination, husbands, partners, church, fabric techniques, and church politics. Oh, and football. It was sacramental. When I think of how close I came to simply smiling and going into my room and shutting the door, I shudder. Miracles hide in all sorts of disguises.

Doctor's Appointment

2006-11-13T16:38:00.000-05:00

When I had my car accident, the insurance folks said I should go see my doctor. Well, I don't have a doctor in the UP. So, I decided maybe I should do something about that, and today, I went to see Dr. Maki.

Dr. Maki is about my age, wears his hair in a very long ponytail, and is a semi-lapsed Episcopalian. He is very interested in progressive Christianity. And thinks its cool that I'm gay. I've died and gone to heaven.

We talked about how we can work in partnership with people in need. We talked about the general good direction of recent elections. We talked about church and politics and local issues. He told me that there is a gay community in Ontonagon, it's just a little hard to find. And then, he went over my health history, did a basic physical exam, and put forth a low-key and non-invasive plan to address a couple of health issues that have been hanging around for a while - nothing serious or scary, but nice to have a plan. And, he immediatelly understood my desire to be as low-key, non-invasive, and unobtrusive as possible, and agreed. He won extra points by not telling me I was too fat (I must lose some weight, but it was nice not to have him say it) or making bad food choices (I know when I'm doing it, and hate naggy docs).

Total time=2 hours. AMAZING. The only bad news is that he's leaving the practice. But, he's hoping to stay in the Western Region of the UP. How cool is that? I like this guy. I like this place. This falls into the "only in the UP" category.

Things seen and heard on the road

2006-11-10T11:40:00.000-05:00

I traveled a number of miles in the last 48 hours, and saw and heard some things that caught my attention in lovely and horrifying ways.

Wednesday night, driving home from Gladstone with my colleague Kevin, a big white owl flew into the path of his car. It was raining sporadically, and quite foggy. I'd joked about being on deer watch, as the deer have really started moving. Suddenly, from nowhere, it seemed, a huge white owl appeared in front of the windshield. It was flying across the road, and was moving so quickly that we didn't hit it, thank goodness. I was so busy thinking deer that owl was outside of my cognitive zone. "What the hell was that?" I asked, even as my brain was slowly coming to owl. Kevin said that in his six years of driving around the UP, he'd never seen an owl like that.

Thursday morning, driving towards Ironwood on M-28, I saw a bald eagle eating a dead deer by the side of the road. It was HUGE. This is my fourth eagle sighting since I've arrived, and by far the closest I've ever been to one. I pulled onto the shoulder, and got a good look before it flew up and over my car. As I drove away, it was circling back to continue its feast.

Finally, Thursday night, I ran to the IGA to get milk, and was scanning for something on the radio. I came to some interesting-sounding choral music. It turned out to be a scary-fundamentalist radio station. I'll confess that I don't usually have much patience for that sort of thing, but before I could hit scan, the voice said, "Tonight, we begin a new bible study on the book of Leviticus." The announcer told us that Dr. So-and-So, the famous biblical scholar will lead us through this "amazing book of the bible. He will tell us," the announcer exclaimed, "why he believes that Leviticus is the most important book in our whole bible."

What? Leviticus? The most important book in our whole bible? Oh please. Well, I was hooked, I have to say. Purity codes? Condemnation against gay and lesbian people? What would this man tell me was the reason for giving Leviticus such vaunted status?

I actually had an anti-NPR moment. Rather than sitting in my car because an NPR story had so captured me, I was sitting in the parking lot in the IGA in horror, listening to this scholar tell the folks out there in radioland that Leviticus was "written by Moses." And that it was important because it was highlighting all those things that Jesus said in the Gospels.

It's no wonder to me that people are so biblically clueless. There are folks out there listening to this crap that sounds so smart and academic (though I have to say that this man sounded like he was about 80, a cattle-rancher, and a chain smoker, he had the raspiest voice I've ever heard). The believe that if someone who has Doctor appended to his name, what is being said must be true.

I was horrified. Clearly. And still am.

They call it "Yooper Initiation"

2006-10-30T20:04:00.000-05:00

What you need to know first - is that I am OK. Fine. A little sore and battered, but FINE. I promise.

It snowed for the fifth time this October on Saturday night. I was in the Central part of the UP for meetings, and staying at my friend Ginny's house in Palmer. On Sunday, there was about an inch on the ground at Ginny's and I headed off to a breakfast meeting. I was quite aware of the somewhat icy road, and felt like I was taking it pretty slowly and carefully.

I came to a curve [really one of an endless series of curves in this road which curves in 3-D like a roller coaster for about six miles]. As I entered the curve, I thought, "You are going to fast for this curve," but there was nothing to do, at that point, as the road was a solid sheet of ice. Sure enough, I swerved left, then right, then left again. I felt the car leave the road; was pretty sure it rolled. It came to rest, tilted. My first words, "Thank God, I'm OK." I felt no pain, at all.

I could not open the driver's door, so I got my feet on the window, moved to the e-brake, pushed hard on the passenger door, and got it open. I was quite high in the air. There was a stump there ["Wow," I thought, "Good thing I didn't hit THAT"]. I stepped on the stump, and got to the ground. The car was clearly not going anywhere, and I was in a ditch with a five foot drop on a pretty lonely road.

I climbed out of the ditch and walked nearly a half mile until I came to a mailbox. The Kotijarvi's let me use their phone to call for help, and then Melba drove me back to my car. When we got to the place, she paled visibly and asked if I were sure I was OK; she promptly took me back to her house for coffee to await the police. Darryl (or Darren, I'm fuzzy here) took me back to the scene when the trooper called to say he was almost there. He told me in the car, "I just got back from Iraq last week. We lost three guys. Actually two guys and a girl. It's bad there." I welcomed him home. He stayed until the trooper arrived.

I was on my way to meet Manuel (my supervisor), Jim (my bishop), Kevin (the diocesan Ministry Development Coordinator) and a number of folks from the standing committee and commission on ministry. We were doing some canonical assessments on a congregation working on commissioning a Ministry Support Team. I was quite sure they would be very worried when I didn't show. I learned later that Jim realized he had a voicemail (as all were wondering where I was) and that he looked shaken when he heard my message, playing it on speaker phone for the whole group to hear.

After the tow truck came, the trooper took me to church. All the folks there fussed and carried on in sweet and caring ways. After church, the tow truck guy took me to the body shop. The body shop loaned me a car. At no point did I show any identification, produce a credit card, or my driver's license! The insurance people have been great.

Tomorrow am, I'll drive back to Ishpiming, return the loaner car and get a rental car until Maggie is fixed. It's still being negotiated, but she's looking repairable - about 10K worth of damage.

I was feeling funky this afternoon, so I called the doc, who told me to go the ER. I walked in and the nurse said, "Are you Fran? The clinic called and said you were coming." vitals, CAT scan, doc consult (minor concussion and bruises, nothing serious), and I was out the door in an hour.

Apparently many folks who drive up here roll a car in the ice at some point. What strikes me most is the kindness of strangers. From the Kotajarvis to Trooper Stanton to the folks at Tim's towing and the owner of Bartanen's auto body, not to mention the folks in the ER at Ontonagon Memorial Hospital, everyone was kind, caring, and lovely.

By the way, here's what the tow truck guys and I have reconstructed about what actually happened: I went into the ditch, missing a utility pole by no more than a foot. The tow truck guys think I rolled twice. The stump is from the tree I broke with the side of my car. What was holding me the tilted position was the trunk of the tree, leaning up against other trees. It was all quite gentle. No crashing, and no jarring. The airbag did not deploy.

My first Tattoo

2006-10-26T23:20:00.000-04:00

I've wanted this tattoo since I was nineteen; as Jeff -the-tattoo-dude pointed out today, that's more than half my life. I think it's safe to say that this was not a phase.

So today, in honor of my ordination to the priesthood three weeks ago, I got this tattoo. In case you are wondering (it's hard to photograph one's own ankle), what you are looking at is a photo of my left ankle.

The most amazing thing about the experience was not the tattoo itself, but the long conversation that Jeff and I had, while he was doing the tattoo. "So," he said to me, "what do you do?"

"I'm an Episcopal priest," I replied.

"Really? That's so cool!" And then, this dude with tattoos covering nearly every inch of exposed skin, multiple piercings, earlobe stretchers, and a T-Shirt reading Strippers really like my pole, proceeded to talk with me about faith, spirituality, and theology for the hour it took him to do the tattoo.

He wanted to know what I thought about various parts of scripture and more about the Episcopal Church. He shared some of his own spiritual thoughts and explorations. To say that it was not what I expected would be understatement beyond measure.

I nearly invited him to attend the 7pm Explore! service at my friend Ginny's church, Trinity Episcopal Church in Houghton, but I was afraid of falling into the crazy-evangelistic-Christian stereotype. So, I've decided that when I get my next tattoo, because, oh yes, there will be another one, that I'll invite him to come.

The great public tattoo unveiling took place at Canterbury House, the campus ministry at Michigan Tech. Rick celebrated by making me a fab latte and teaching my how to run their high-tech espresson maker. The house was packed with more than a dozen students, and they thought it was great. It was the perfect setting to take the wrapping off in.

I've spent the rest of the day grinning like a fool, trying to be nonchalant about looking at my ankle.

Rodney and Graham

2006-10-25T15:45:00.000-04:00

On Monday, I played host to Rodney and Graham, two blokes visiting the UP from the Diocese of Aberdeen and Orkney in the Episcopal Church of Scotland. These wonderful and funny men traveled to the UP to learn about how we do mutual ministry and to learn more about the Visitors' Weekend that we host here each year to introduce others to mutual ministry. Both are involved in Local Collaborative ministry (one of the funny things about this work is that it gets called something different in every diocese that uses it!).

There were many funny moments; we laughed a lot as we navigated (another) snowstorm to visit the church in Ironwood. My favourite moment, however came after we stopped for petrol and coffee. They encountered, apparently for the first time, beef jerky. They found it puzzling and declared it both strange and gross. My instant reply: For men who come from a culture that things that haggis is appealing, you have NOTHING to say about beef jerky. We all laughed so hard we cried. They agreed that I might be right.

Second Eucharist

2006-10-23T14:41:00.000-04:00

In the Episcopal Church, one must be ordained as a priest in order to preside at the Eucharist (aka The Lord's Supper or Communion). Generally, after ordination, a great deal of attention is paid to one's first Eucharist. Friends and family who traveled for the ordination often stick around to participate in the service. It's wonderful, amazing, powerful, terrifying, and all a bit unreal.

I was ordained priest on October 7, 2006, and presided at my first service the next day in Ontonagon. I was blessed to have more than a dozen friends and family members who could be there. Some things went wrong, mostly it was fine, and I felt thankful that there are other priests in my life who were willing to take the time to work with me beforehand, so that I felt pretty comfortable with what I was supposed to do.

Yesterday, I presided at my second Eucharist. Driving to Ironwood (65 miles each way) I experienced what I have experienced every Sunday since coming to the UP: profound gratitude at being here, in this place, and with these people, doing this work. Part way to Ironwood, what started as a bit of frozen rain turned into serious snow. By the time I arrived, later than I'd hoped, it was snowing in earnest.

I had just enough time to check in with the others who would be part of the service, Mel as deacon, Jake as acolyte, Maj-Britt as reader. I spread my chausible out on the altar rail. I set the ribbons where I needed them in the altar book. I took a look at the church from behind the altar in the presider's position.

Then, I went back to the office to vest. Alb. Cincture. That felt normal. I've been putting those things on for years. Then came the stole. Only those ordained wear stoles, in the Episcopal church. Deacons wear them over the left shoulder, crossed in front, fastened under the right arm. Priests wear them around the neck, hanging down in front. My green stole (for we are still in that long green season after Pentecost) was a gift from Anne and Lucia, when I was ordained deacon. I put it on, along with my VTS pectoral cross. And I realized that I am, in fact, a priest. That fact has hit me, occasionally, over the last two weeks. Say, when someone asked me what I do. But somehow, in the office in Ironwood, it became real for me.

We prayed, Mel made some announcements, and the service began. At the Eucharist, Mel prepared the table and I took my place, standing behind the altar. Given the floor plan in Ironwood, the folks in the back row might as well be in Hurley, WI (several miles down the road!). Somehow, I hadn't really noticed how far away they were, when the church was empty.

"Better project," I thought. I took a deep breath, and began: "The Lord be with you." And I was there. Praying with those who had gathered. Again, it flashed through my head that I am, in fact, a priest. That I was praying the ancient prayer of the church. That I was presiding at the liturgy (liturgy=the work of the people, btw) of the table. With our prayers, bread and wine became body and blood. And like all of creation, it was very good.